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Patch Notes for Cayo Perico Heist Update 1.52

[December 15, 2020] – New Content in Grand Theft Auto Online

GTA Online Fixes

Game Stability and Performance

Matchmaking & Networking

Content

Awards and Daily Objectives

Properties

Vehicles

Clothing

Miscellaneous

Story Mode

submitted by PapaXan to gtaonline [link] [comments]

Patch notes and changes [PSA]

Patch Notes for Cayo Perico Heist Update 1.52
[December 15, 2020] – New Content in Grand Theft Auto Online

GTA Online Fixes

Game Stability and Performance

Matchmaking & Networking

Content

Awards and Daily Objectives

Properties

Vehicles

Clothing

Miscellaneous

Story Mode

submitted by YtBipolarGamers to gtaglitches [link] [comments]

Had this game really improved by a lot ? A retrospective of 28 months.

Hello fellow Idlers,

Since many months, I saw this sub torn between two visions of the game, and the recent updates.
A first group, including me, thinks this game has a very slow evolution, makes shitty updates, and is more and more greedy towards the whales and their bank account. We are many, and we all agree on many points : updates of this game and the direction it takes is not good for most of the playerbase, and dolphins/low spenders are forgotten for every event. Many left, guilds died a lot this year, even in old servers. Many small spenders and monthly subscribers stopped spending, and a big bunch of players plans to leave at the end of the year after the big events. That's a fact, and this is not good for the future of the game.
A second group seems to defend the devs a lot, shouting at the first ones when they want QoL updates, when they think an event is shitty, or greedy. They think that DH is making a good job at listening to players, answers requests, make QoL updates, and that the game improved A LOT (read that one frequently)

I'm not here to defend my point of view about the game (I'm ranting enough on this sub), but to give FACTS.

To do that, I looked back on this sub, at a time when a player named Folstar used to make "to-do lists" to the devs, reporting every problem of QoL this game has. Let's see a post from July 2018, 28 months back. (I'll let math addicts calculate the amount of money DH made during this lap of time....).

For reference, here is the post I digged out : https://www.reddit.com/IdleHeroes/comments/8ze2ee/folstars_dev_to_do_list_vol_5/
I won't copy past every detail of this post, so I invite you to take a look at all the complaints we had 2 years back. Essentially, we have almost the same now.

  1. Guild Wars : change came in 2020. Long overdue, but with a new system that isn't perfect. Still an improvement, so 1 point for team 2.
  2. Equipment/Artifact loadouts. LOL. 1 point for team 1.
  3. Faction sorting button anywhere we select heroes. Still nothing
  4. Celestial Islands Small Islands Skipping. Done last year. With a big update of CI, which is, IMO, the only good update we had recently.
  5. BT Skip Battle. Done last week.
  6. Smash should automatically prompt with the maximum number of attacks available : still nope.
  7. Shard Sorting. That's a nope.
  8. Marketplace/Casino/Super : .........still nothing
  9. Skins as Avatars. Yeeah, we got this one !
  10. Avatar Sorting. The current system could be considered like a sorting, a bad one, but still.
  11. Excessive Exclusive Skins. Still nothing, we got only exclusive skins as new ones now. That's a regress.
  12. You, Skins, and RNG. Still nothing about the accesibility of skins. Oh, yes, you can buy one for 50$ every week now. And you get way less shards than before.Woopsie, my bad, we indeed get shards for Imp event
  13. Block/Precision. Still shitty stats, except for Horus. Dodge was way more interesting...
  14. Rerolling the Same Thing You Are Replacing. I thought they said it was corrected months ago, but I had a try few days ago and still nothing : you can still get the exact same stone... Correct me if I'm wrong, I can't waste more dust !
  15. Friends and Mail. Still nothing
  16. Guildies are Friendies. Still nothing
  17. More Challenges. .......Nothing ? Some would consider Void to be a challenge. It is a challenge of patience, sort of... Or a challenge to be motivate enough to do some Vortex battles or some Realms gate clicking....
  18. Another tier (or 2) of Event Raids. ........... and nothing again
  19. Update Quests. Small changes here and there, but almost the same as at the launch of the game. No new mode is included. Daily quests are still garbage.
  20. Casino Store. Still a useless store.
  21. Soul Stone Shards. No changes at all, of course.
  22. Altar Returns Shards for 6 Star and higher heroes. Absolutely nothing changed.
  23. Raid Boss Notification. We had changes concerning this one, so I guess it's a tie. FS is not perfect, but an improvement of the nothingness we had at the time.
  24. Saving on Server Change. Fixed in 2019
  25. Casino Spinner Rewards. Oh, nothing : the casino wheel is still as shitty as before. No interest at all in the rewards, and you ?
  26. Monster Rebirthing. Still consuming your gold.
  27. Red Dot on Event Raid. Yeepeeee, it changed. I think so.
  28. Artifact rerolling and/or breaking into shards. Still nothing. We can fodder artifacts now, but it's not for all players AT ALL.
  29. 12* Hours Timers. Nothing, still this shitty 12h timer, punishing you for every minute missed.
  30. Slightly Reduce All Timers. Nothing again.


Amongst 30 SIMPLE changes recommended 28 months back, only 9 were in fact developped or corrected by the devs.
In the same time, we had the 640$ frame, the Void update, the 2k$ SFX and the anniversary hero hidden behind a paywall of stupid RNG, just to name a few.

Conclusion : NO, DH Games is not listening enough to players. No, the small updates we have once in a while are not good enough. No, this game had not IMPROVED A LOT, but just corrected 9 of the 30 problems we had 28 months back. 21 are still there, and many more came with recent updates.

TL/DR : In 28 months, devs corrected 9 of the 30 QoL problems we had. No, this game didn't improve enough the QoL of players.
submitted by Spycken to IdleHeroes [link] [comments]

Ideas for new stuff

My friends and I had some ideas for new locations, POI's and vehicles that we'd like to see in the upcoming seasons and game in general:







I really hope you like my ideas and feel free to share your ideas in the comments! (just don't be mean if someone has a different opinion on the old island)
EDIT 1: I've added some more weapons and stuff.
submitted by Meme_Chan69420 to FortNiteBR [link] [comments]

[Let's build D100] Ships you might come across in a busy port.

The party has come into a busy port and decide to visit some other ships. Who might they discover, what might they find?

d100 Interesting Ships in a Port


  1. Shani and Aurora's Tent of Two - The two goblin sisters Shani and Aurora sail providing services to port settlements. Shani claims to be a seer and charges 60gp for a "reading" of the future (she is not). Aurora 'The useful one' provides the service of casting identify for 20gp. She may also agree to sell some of her extensive library if offered the right price. [dweeb_bush]
  2. The Bones Brothers - The bones brothers are a travelling group of jolly bards. As their name suggests they are animated skeletons. Jimbo-double bass, Timbo-guitar, Limbo-vocals, Dimbo-marimba and Franky-drums. They are very hospitable and put on a show for anyone who comes and visits them! [dweeb_bush]
  3. The Lovers - A small nondescript boat lies just off the dock. The is no sign of activity on board apart from the dock inspector who is trying to find out who's boat it is. The truth is the owners of the boat died ten days ago and the boat has miraculously drifted safely into port. on a successful DC 10 investigation or perception check the party members discover two young male elves cowering in the cannonball chest. When the lid is lifted they start begging for their life. If pressed they reveal that the crew was attacked by sirens, the majority of the crew succomed to the siren's calls however the two young boys, deeply infatuated with each other did not care for their temptation. They ran out of food last night and thought they were surely doomed! [dweeb_bush]
  4. The Crows - A large black boat rests in port, neatly secured off one of the more expensive jettys. The most defining feature of the boat is that it is bustling with activity, not by humanoids but 3d12 black ravens. One wears a small captains hat and appears to undersatnd the party. If the party casts speak with animals they discover that the crows were awakened through a series of trials on a new spell aimed to mass awaken a group of creatures. The crows have varying degrees of intelligence and are all chaotic neutral alligned. The crows rebelled from, Hignory Flip, the wizard running the trials on a small island about 2 days sail from the port, and stole his ship. [dweeb_bush]
  5. Captain Redbeak! - A suspicious longship hovers low on the water. There is a steady stream of humanoids entering the covered boat and leaving a few minutes later with a small package. The ship belongs to Captain Redbeak, a feirce pirate captain who runs a drug trade: the drug in question is a relatively cheap drug called "Peak Water" and is collected dew from mountaintops, it gives the user a high that lasts 1d4 hours and gives the user a d4 of bardic inspiration. It costs 10gp per hit. The ship is manned by 2d6 Bandits, and if threatened or reported they will attempt to kill the party in defence of their lives. [dweeb_bush]
  6. Crazy Mr McGee - A delerious man stands warding off the dock guards with what looks like a loaded blunderbus. He's yelling about his notorious reputation as a savage pirate and keeps claiming they have come to "Take away my princess". The princess he's referring to is his boat- he imagines that it is a glourious gallion but in reality it's just a rowboat. If the party manage to subdue the man the dock guards thank them and offer to buy them a drink later that night in the tavern. [dweeb_bush]
  7. A Con??? - The players are drawn to a commotion hidden behind a crowd of people. A large goliath (Manneo) seems to have taken a small dwarf (Skalgrouth) hostage and is threatening to slit his throat if the dock guard do not meet his demands "I'll bloody well kill 'im if you don't give me what I want: 100gp worth of rubies and free passage out of this shit hole!". In reality the goliath and dwarf are working together pulling off this stunt at various ports in the area, so far, to great success! [dweeb_bush]
  8. The Rat's Den - The players follow a stream of rats on board a decrepid looking riverfairing vessel. When they make cross into the canvassed interior they see an old kobold playing the pipes, he seems to be a rat-catcher. If the party interrupt him in his ritual he turns the a swarm of rats against the party and runs off into the port. [dweeb_bush]
  9. Seeking Refuge - A smallish sloop titled 'The Diamond Endeavour' pulls into port, it's sinking and fast! A crew member (Emery Green) jumps onto the dockside and is yelling for help. The vessel was struck by a great storm while at sea and they sustained damage when they brushed by a reef. Luckily they werent wrecked but unluckily they could not repair all the damage with materials on board. They've been bailing for hours and can no longer bail as fast as the ship is filling up with water! If the characters wish to help they can make a DC 13 group athletics check to bail enough water to stop the crew from having to jump ship and leave it to sink. If the players are successful Emery thanks them profusely and offers them a map to a shipwreck they were on the way to dive at before the storm hit them. "It's rumoured that this is the wreck of the old pirate lord, Feather Toothed Bill's ship and may hold riches beyond imagine!" [dweeb_bush]
  10. The Gilded Sail - A group of merchants, all of various races, each offering unique, and expensive, magical trinkets. True to their name, their sail is actually a thin sheet of gold, and the rest of their ship is covered in valuable metals and gems. It’s also very well armed, as are the merchants aboard. Keep an eye on the rogue when this one’s around. [Dragon_Overlord]
  11. The Patchwork - A large ship which seems to have been destroyed and repaired numerous times with whatever material the crew had, from birch wood to copper metal to even welded armor and weapons. Speaking of the crew, they appear to be a mishmash of Kenku, Kobold, Halfling, and the occasional Tabaxi and Goblin. The captain appears to be a raccoon by the name of Majos, which, if your party stumbles upon the question of why and how a raccoon is a ship captain, she would respond with “a salty mage who didn’t know how to win a simple game of cards had a tantrum.” She would then offer the party a game of cards in which if the party beats Majos, she rewards the party a hefty sum of 100 GP, and if any party member is any of the races listed above, she rewards an additional magic item (DM’s choice) and offers a position to the party member for them to join her crew. Accept and the party is taken to an additional encounter to an island for treasure. Decline is acceptable and Majos would accept any favor from the party. [SpyroAndToothless]
  12. The Feyr Winds - An elegant ship that carries goods and treasures from far off Elven lands run by a mixture of elven and faerie creatures. Their most illustrious goods are fruits that can do many things such as heal wounds, cure poisons, or even granting stat bonuses for a minute! (Vendor: Fruits are magical and can take on the effect of any potion you want.) [OSpiderBox]
  13. Gnasher's Maw - A tribal-ized longship driven by a "merry" band of lizard folk. They obviously don't understand personal space or social norms, and are seeking people to help them with a Giant problem. (Hook: if your party is having downtime while they look for their next quest, this could be that hook they need.) [OSpiderBox]
  14. The Esteemed Steamboat - Artificers run this marvel of steam engineering. However... it's currently in a state of disrepair. Looks like heavy damage from some monstrosity. While they're extremely proficient in fixing it, they have no money and are looking for work to pay for supplies. (Allies: party could hire some of them for an upcoming task/adventure, or even offer to fund the repairs in exchange for favopassage.) [OSpiderBox]
  15. The Mainstream (You’ll never need a bigger boat!) - A casino cruise ship featuring a large game room, several bars, comfortable rooms, a pool and a hot tub fueled by a continual flame spell. It is captained by a tall, brown scaled lizardfolk woman named Kepesk. The dealers are kenku bards repeating rules and barking (“Step right up, try you’re luck at the Wheel of the Goddess of Fortune!”) There is also a large vault of gold on board, guarded by lizardfolk soldiers. One particular patron is looking for a few helping hands for a bit of a caper now that he knows the guards patrol schedules. [spiff2]
  16. Rocinante - A relatively fancy and expensive ship being up kept by the Quijano family and their servants. The last living member of the family is a young man, obsessed with swords and thirst for adventure. He agrees to let the team borrow the ship, in exchange for him coming with them on their adventures to wherever they’re going. [DrFishPhd]
  17. Deep Blue - In a corner of the harbour, a seemingly empty ship. Sails are neatly furled, crew seems to have left the ship mere hours ago. On the deck, small openings allows the visitor to enter the hold, in it, some barrels, hammocks. Beside one of the hammock, a book, quite old, written in an old version of Common language.In the middle of the hold, some blankets cover a group of trunks, under these trunks, another opening ... leading to another hold. In this hold, vessels, old fashioned lanterns, and some parchment written in ancient language. At the bottom of a bulkhead, an opening, some stairs gong down in another hold.Wood seems ancient, and strange figures are carved into the wooden parts of the boats. Some ancient runes are covering pillars. In the middle of the hold, a panel with nails made of some unknown metal, once open, stairs going down in the dark. From the shadows, the noise of little splaches. [doctor_providence]
  18. The Mosquito - Run by a crew of githyanki pirates. What seems like a normal battle vessel, once on the open ocean, the sails begin turning outward and suddenly the ship begins gliding above the waters surface at fast speeds. [GladiatorJustin]
  19. The C.H.U.D.- The Shell of a massive deceased Dragonturtle floats next to the dock, it’s ends sealed by mechanical claws, and a viewport fitted into the front. The C.H.U.D. (Chelonian Hammerworked Underwater Dirigible) was designed by the Gnomish Inventor Hector Copperspark. Crewed by gnomes and halflings as they are the only ones small enough to man the complex machinery crammed into the turtle shell, the C.H.U.D. is a mercenary vessel that hires out to perform naval attacks. Hector just got a lead on a new job, and he needs some muscle to pull it off... [Lakandalwa]
  20. The Temple - A ship that serves as a mobile temple to a water deity. It goes from port to port to carry services. [SMGB_NeonYoshi]
  21. Cloudscraper - One of the gems of the Romish Empire's formidable fleet, the Cloudscraper is a powerful warship specially constructed for defeating sea monstrosities of all kinds. Developed after the Queen's late husband was killed by an island feeder (colossal sea beasts known for swallowing swaths of land whole), this vessel with an imposing tower-like bridge is loaded up with all types of harpoons, cannons, and magical armor. Some even say that, thanks to a powerful magical engine, the top half of the ship can separate from the brig to chase after flying beasts attempting to get away. With how famous it is, plenty of townsfolk are eager to get a look at the shining bronze beast of a boat. But what's it doing here of all places? [MildlyConcernedGhost]
  22. The Wistful Wanderer - A small sloop with a single cabin in the middle of the deck. A skilled observer might note that the sails and rigging as well as the rudder occasional shift to right the ship or tighten and secure themselves more. The cabin is actually permanently enchanted with a Mordenkainen’s Magnificent mansion and the ship is handled by a permanent crew of 20 unseen servants. It is owned by the Wandering Wizard Wesley Wrycroft. He sails the world at his leisure, seeking trade for scrolls and arcane artifacts. He also regularly hires adventurers to gather difficult to reach artifacts from unworthy hands whenever he finds a lead on the location of such a relic. [Lakandalawa]
  23. The Magic Brawler - A merchant ship with a very strong looking captain comes to port. If the party chooses to look at their items the captain will challenge the party to an arm wrestling match. Beating a DC 20 strength check will award the party one minor magic item from the captain's personal stash, and beating a DC 25 strength check will award a magic item of the DMs choosing. [TheInstitute4]
  24. The Friend Ship - A comfortable looking wooden ship full of people just hanging out on the deck. While aboard this ship you find yourself under the effects of the Charm Person spell to make everyone friendly with each other. [Stormkiko]
  25. The Dragon Ship - Captained by a Dragonborn with a dragon head on the prow, this ship is a merchant vessel crewed by a muscular Dragonborn who sits on the deck smoking a long pipe. The ship has put down for repairs after grazing a rock which tore a few holes in the starboard side. [AndreTheSalty]
  26. Kender - A rag tag ship filled with swashbuckling Kender. The ship looks like it was made from bits and pieces of many different ships.The Kender are very drunk and have no idea how they got to this port. [Slainlion]
  27. The Poor Captain - A ship that looks broken and near sinking, in truth it's one of the most armed ship on the seas. It uses help calls or just their non threatening look to lure ships close so that they can attack them. [DungeonsAndScouts]
  28. The Fisticuffs- A medium sized rowdy ship sits a little way out from the dock. The ship has two massive hands stemming from the hulls on long mechanical arms. The hands have an AC of 25, a damage threshold of 5, and 30 health each. They ship can leave the water and "walk" on the hands. The ship is primarily a combat ship and is crewed by a band of mischevious gnome tinkerers. In addition to attacking (+10 to hit: 4d6 + 8 bludgeoning damage) the hands can also cast Bigby's hand once per day. [dweeb_bush]
  29. The Grain Barge - A large barge with a dirt floor and wheat growing. A single old man lives on the barge, and sells wheat for 2 pountds per copper piece. In the hull of the barge, accessible only by a trapdoor in the old man's shack, is a large pile of carrots. [serious_tabaxi]
  30. Sea Rot - A large gallion speeds into port with a yellow flag raised. As soon as they dock and have paid the docking fee the captain, a large half-orc woman called Mishka, starts calling for help! She reveals that over half of her crew has contracted a strange plague and she fears for her life. She came to port to seek medical assisstance but fears she is infected so dares not go ashore.The plague - Sea Rot - Is highly contagious and air-borne: if a creature comes within 5ft. of an infected creature they must succeed on a DC 17 Constitution save or become infected themself, symptoms take 1d10 days to manifest. The symptoms of Sea Rot are gruesome, starting with the extremities of the body, the body starts depositing water in cytoplasm-like sacks. At the end of every long rest the creature takes 2d6 cold damage and must succeed on a DC 13 Constitution save or suffer 1 permanent constitution damage, the infected creature also has disadvantage on strength and dexterity checks. It can only be cured by magical means that remove a disease.If the party fetches help she rewards them with a small favour and a pouch full of gemstones worth 50gp, in addition, if the party can cure the 20 crew members and contain the plague she offers them passage anywhere, offers an additional 100gp, and her cutlass- a +1 scimmitar that also increases the holder's charisma by 2 while holding it. [dweeb_bush]
  31. Grok's Galley - A medium-sized ship piloted by a Tortle named Grok(He Understands Things)11. The ship is a 2 sailed vessel with few cannons and other wartime mechanisms on them. The crew is very resilient and full of ragtag non-humaniods. Gnolls, Dragonborn, Ratfolk etc.He's about to set sail back home as he's heard of this group of ratfolk that are trying to overthrow the government in his home town. [VKilledTInternet]
  32. The Abigail - An old warship thought to be lost that had been renovated and turned into an inn. It’s run by two very attractive siblings, who turn out to be sirens and one night, they take the boat out to the sea and eat all the passengers. [TardyTortoise]
  33. The Comfort - This massive galleon is an independent freebooter that refuses to pay allegiance to any nation or city. Housing a collection of skilled healers and clerics, the Comfort sails to areas struck by famine, plague, and war, providing healing to whomever requests it. The sailors aboard the vessel have all sworn the same oath, to defend the healers and their patients with their lives no matter the cost.While the Comfort usually is accepted at any port, it sometimes comes under attack when it travels to war torn regions and as such is well equipped to defend itself should it come under attack. [Lakandalawa]
  34. Arabian Traders - An exotic merchant vessel filled with silks, spices, and strange spirits is disembarking. A dashing arabian prince asks basic questions about the city, potentially becoming enamored with one of the party members. He is rich and slightly crazy, and believes anything can be bought for a price. This gets him into trouble when he tries to buy someone's hand in marriage to add to his collection of luxuries and many wives back in his home port. [jfractal]
  35. Deep Sea Scavengar - Salty, untrustworthy sailors (who look like pirates) are disembarking/unloading from their latest voyage. They have been at sea for months, and haven't seen a woman in that long - they openly hit on and jeer at any females in the group with a CHA score of 11 or higher. One sailor tells a fanciful story about sirens that they encountered on their voyage, killing 3 of their men (it's hard to tell if they are serious or not). [jfractal]
  36. His majesty's secret - A heavily outfitted, small warship is in a secret mission from the king. Heavily armed/armored guards stand watch over the docks, turning away everyone, and refusing to divulge their purpose here. [jfractal]
  37. Smallminded Yokels - A small, local fishing vessel filled with xenophobic, small-minded fisherman. The make disparaging remarks about any non-humans if approached. If the party gives them lip, they will get jumped by the crew the next time they wander the harbor at night. [jfractal]
  38. Mussel's Mate - A large fishing vessel that has seen it's better days. Rigging is in tatters, masts are spliced together, mismatched patchworks sails. Oddly enough the captains quarters are extremely well apportioned not at all like the rest of the ship. [hamlet_d]
  39. The Wayward Lady - This ship has an all female crew. The species on board are the outcasts from different lands. They serve as a place for any who are lost to have a home, though men don't tend to stay for long for some reason. After a successful DC 20 insight check it can be found that men on board the ship for 4 months become women. [42firehawk]
  40. The Gypsy - On the deck is what appears to be a stage where beautiful female dancers perform to music provided by a small band of bards. One of the dancers, who is known as the Storyteller, tells stories through song as the rest of the dancers provide her the visuals/backup dancing. Her voice is noticeably quite low for a woman, but is very enchanting nonetheless. An insight check with a DC20 will reveal that all of the performers are cross-dressing men. [Crystalized13]
  41. The Stable - A ship of decent size that carries horses (or any other kind of mount in your game) from port to port and sells them at a decent price to tired and/or injured travelers. It is crewed by a family of six (mother is the captain, father, three sons, three daughters) and a few extras the gathered along their journey, namely; a nice old man who wants to see the world, a young woman with a fiery attitude and an obvious crush on one of the party members, a muscular Dragonborn who has obviously seen some action who now tends to the horses, a bard who offers entertainment to the crew on board and is particularly liked by the children, a mute Druid who helps the horses and is good friends with the Dragonborn (who interprets their sign), and an ex-pirate who loves the sea but wishes to leave their past behind them. [Crystalized13]
  42. The Penny Bucket - The penny bucket is barely a ship. It's looks like a wash-bucket with a wooden T nailed to it and has a large white shirt as a sale. As far as you can tell there's no way to steer, its an utter mystery to you how it ended up in port, let alone why the dock authority would charge it to dock. When you peer inside the bucket you see a small red pseudodragon peacefully sleeping on it's hoard, which consists of 3pp, 16gp, 103sp, and 56cp, 6 rubies worth 30gp, and a dusty diamond worth 300gp , and a small magical trinket of the DM's choice. If woken up the Pseudodragon wakes up and fiercely snarls , cowering, and protecting its stuff. The dragon will trade any of the items in its hoard if the adventurers offer something of value, or a large amount of food. If the party wants to adopt the dragon along with it's hoard it may be won over with gifts and a DC18 animal handling check. [dweeb_bush]
  43. The Crafty Raft - A makeshift raft has floated down the coast and slammed into the dock. There is no one on board and it appears to be unmanned. There is a note fixed to the mast with a tiny butterknife. The note has directions, "at the lightning stump follow the stream and rescue us". The raft, and attached note were made by crafty goblins attempting to lure creatures down the coast right into a trap. The goblins have made finding their hideout incredibly easy. With a DC 5 nature (tracking) check the party can find the tree and follow it down to the river. The real trap is a series of pitfall traps cleverly hidden in and around the stream. If the adventurers continue along the stream they must succeed on a DC18 Perception check to avoid it and must succeed on a DC14 Dexterity save or fall 10ft. into spikes and take 1d6 bludgeoning damage and 2d6 piercing damage. They are then accosted by 2d4 goblins. [dweeb_bush]
  44. The Illusory Boat - Moored in the port is a huge gleaming golden pirate ship, there must be at least 50 richly dressed halflings manning it. There's a long gangplank extending to the dock. Suddenly there's the noise of several cannons firing off. The guards rush over to the ship, fearing that they are attacking the port. They scream at the ship- "come down here and speak to us you cowards, we can't board your ship without permission but we will call the town guard!" A voice calls from the ship yelling insults at the guards aiming to infuriate them till they board the boat. If any one steps on the gangplank they must succeed on a DC 14 Dexterity save or fall into the water, as they do the ship dissapears and it's revealed that the entire ship is a major illusion cast by three giggling wizards who run away from one of the neighboring piers. [dweeb_bush]
  45. The Question - There's a metallic ship floating in the water. From it you hear loud beeping, chirping, and whirring noises coming from it and it's attracted a large crowd of 3d10 townsfolk, who are fearfully inspecting the ship. As you approach closer you begin to hear a voice in all the artificial noises. You hear it asking thousands of questions, in thousands of voices: "who am I?", "why am I here?", "What's that ugly thing over there?", "what is the meaning to life", "Why are there people watching me?", and other creepy remarks that give the idea that the ship is conscious and scared. When the adventurers look into the boat they see a blinking green, light with a swirling marbled texture on it. The light turns red and starts asking questions very specific to the party. Before long it begins speaking in tongues and a flash of blinding light appears. The adventurers make a DC13 constitution save. On a failed save they are blinded for a minute and take 4d4 psychic damage or half as much on a successful save. When the adventurers look again the ship is gone and there is just a small gemstone floating in the water, whispering to the party in tongues that are unintelligible. [dweeb_bush]
  46. The mistake -A small boat that seems to have been renamed fairly recently. The - ake part of the name is in a different calligraphy and color from the rest of the name [Ido97]
  47. The Barnacle - An old weathered gun-ship bearing it's scars from many a battle, but nevertheless being no worse for the wear. Built strong from some ancient hardwoods and it has been well maintained to the best a ship of that age could be. The crew is a rowdy bunch of salty Dawgs that work as hard as they play...and they fight even harder. They may squabble amongst themselves, but don't you dare mess with or insult one of their brotherhood. They have come to port ready to sell their wares, collect their bounty and spend it irresponsibly. All so they can find their next mission and do it all over again. [gothic03]
  48. The Bauntoo - A strange ramshackle ship occupied by amphibious humanoids that spend near their entire lives out at sea, trade in weird cool stuff they've found deep diving into cool underwater locations like ocean ruins, and wont be at port for long. [Swerve-Bro]
  49. The Leviathan - A huge ship listing hard to one side, its mast broken halfway up and the sails drooping to the deck. All of the wood is dark brown, slimy and rotting out. It looks like someone pulled a shipwreck from the bottom of the sea and it remained afloat by some miracle. If the party inspects the ship, they will find it has already been thoroughly looted and all that remains of the crew are skeletons. (Whether the skeletons are animated or not is up to you). The dock guards will tell you that a huge fog rolled in last night and this ship was there when the fog lifted. [painterinsomniac]
  50. The Menagerie - A decent sized merchant ship, this one is run by all sorts of different creatures though none are humanoid. This ship was originally a travelling circus showing off all manner of awakened animals who were kept captive. The animals are quite amiable and will offer carry passengers in exchange for assistance selling their goods in markets. [painterinsomniac]
  51. The Coffin - A casket-shaped ship that contains the body of a 21-ft giant. The top of the casket has been fitted with sails and rigging and is manned by a crew of humans who tell the party that the giant hired them before his death. He always wanted to sail around the world, so half of all his treasures would be given to the crew who sailed him around the world. The money is to be awarded upon the crews return to the giant's family home, and the crew must have an artefact from each land to prove their voyage complete to the family and get their loot. Of course, the crew isn't bothering with actually sailing around the world - they're content to just make port for a year and trade people for ancestral trinkets so they can return to the land of giants in a year and take their massive loot. They've been given a hefty advance to cover the cost of their long voyage, so money is no object. Adventurers can sell their items if the item is from a distinct background (eg a Dwarven Warhammer, an Elven scroll of healing, etc). [Anceaus]
  52. The Lighthouse - This ship is captained by a young cowardly wizard and an equally nervous-looking crew of young human men. Atop the central mast is a large lighthouse light, which the owner uses to keep other ships far away from him while at sea so as to avoid any trouble. If approached, the captain will immediately begin grovelling and handing over loot at the sight of the party's weapons, offering them any onboard services he can think of for his crew to do for them (shoeshines, blade sharpening, armour mending).Turns out it's all an act - the captain is actually a conniving trickster who transports and deals in Light Blue Light, a magical drug that induces paranoia/twitchy behaviour but grants a 1d6 bonus to Strength for a period of 1 hour. [Anceaus]
  53. The Nest - A vaguely ship-shaped bramble of collected branches and tar, this vessel doesn't look like it should even float, much less sail. It's run completely by Kenku's. They love to collect shiny objects and every nook and cranny of the nest is filled with glittering pieces of treasure and trinkets, among which are a range of magical items.Anything can be bought for a price, but what they especially want is for the adventurers to help them get a shiny old chalice that they've spotted beneath the waters of the harbour - they aren't big swimmers. [Anceaus]
  54. The Half-Pint - An average looking, 2nd-rate ship run exclusively by halflings and gnomes. The crew are rolling a large number of barrels off the ship. A DC 13 Investigation Check will uncover that the Half-Pint has almost twice as many decks as a regular ship of that size and the diminutive crew use the extra space to smuggle illegal magical ale that has explosive side effects. If approached, the first mate (a scruffy gnome named Sebastiano who trusts people a little too easily considering his trade) will ask the party if they are 'for hire' or just want a cask.If the party is looking to buy, refer to the http://dndspeak.com/2017/12/100-random-potion-effects/ to determine what effect their beer has.If they're interested in the job, he would have them guard a supply wagon transporting contraband IPA to an old wizard who lives in an ivory tower in the nearby forest for a sum of 25gp each. What the party doesn't know is that the wizard is in the process of transitioning into a Lich, and the beer is the magical conduit by which he has been transforming. The wizard has the stats of a Revenant if the party chooses to fight him. If an unconscious creature drinks the illegal beer, they will be revived and become Undead. [Anceaus]
  55. The "Blu Moon" - A two masted Caravel. An ocean going merchant ship, that has recently been damaged by pirates, but escaped because they dumped all cargo overboard. The ship is being repaired and expected to be ready in two days. The captain, Quintus "Full" Moon, already has agreed to transport 24 bales of dyed fabric to [INSERT DESTINATION] but is now looking for some more cargo for the same destination. The rest of the crew is: first mate Eldan Wind (m half-elf), bosun Karrla (f half-orc), helmsman Olfie Re (f half-elf), cook Carlin Zwiet (f gnome), and four human sailors: Frenk(m), Ra(f), Tjoris(m) en Huub(m). Huub is a 12 year old boy on his first trip. [Jeeve65]
  56. The Leatherback - A merchant ship from a faraway land. It is made of a beautiful reddish wood and adorned with many colorful flags. About half the crew is made up of tortles and the other half consists of various other races they picked up on their travels. They are very friendly people and will happily buy you a drink or two in exchange for stories of your adventures or of the places and cultures you’ve experienced. If they take a liking to you they're even willing to give you free passage to wherever you'd like to travel... as long as that place happens to be the next port along their voyage. [TheMightyLoaf]
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submitted by dweeb_bush to d100 [link] [comments]

An extensive list of features I would like to see implemented into TC2 or any future titles.

This list will consist of the beginnings of an outstanding open-world racing game from many of the features I've conceptualized. I've always had a thought/fantasy in my head of taking some of the best features from many racing games and rolling them into one fantastic game. There have been so many quirks and great things across many racing games and even non-racing games that could be implemented into other racing games to improve upon games. I think some game developers and creative directors owe it to themselves to play many other racing games themselves to draw inspiration from other games and they should directly use polls in social media to see what people want the most, so resources can be allocated in that direction. I will refer to many games throughout this as I feel a lot of racing games (and other games in general) made over the last 15 years or so have features that could contribute to the concepts that would create a great game. Game abbreviations will include MC (Midnight Club), NFS (Need for Speed), TC (The Crew) FH (Forza Horizon), FM (Forza Motorsport), GT (Gran Turismo), GTA (Grand Theft Auto) and TDU (Test Drive Unlimited). This list will not be suggesting any locations, vehicle or part manufacturers directly unless something is used as an example, this is just features that could be incorporated upon a base game. Developers will obtain whatever licenses they can and I don't see this as a thing to extensively cover. An example is that we would all love to see Toyota, but obtaining their license recently has been difficult for many companies. One thing that I can't speak of as I have no personal use, is steering wheels. I'd like to hear some feedback on how to create the optimal steering wheel experience in a racing game.
Physics: Driving physics control the entire driving experience of a racing game so these are ultimately the most important thing to get correct. There have been many games that have gotten so many things right with a mediocre or worse physics system that detracted from the experience so much that the legacy of the games it applies to are tarnished regardless of how many other things are done well, with TDU2 is a great example. Ideally, they would be on par with FH4. Some extent of arcade physics would be nice, but not to the extent of some of the Ghost produced NFS games to where there is some oddly conflicting attempt of two physics systems fighting each other to determine if you are attempting to drift or grip. There would be a difference in the feeling of drivetrains and the AWD wouldn't be dominant over RWD in paved road scenarios, tuning and efficient driving could make RWD better due to the car being lighter.
Controller mappings/settings: I will continue to reiterate the ability to customize things to the user's liking should be the biggest priority in many categories. The ability to enable and disable vibration in the handles and triggers individually would be nice. It's good to have the choice setting of linearity and inner and outer dead zones. I will be using an Xbox controller for my ideal pre mapped settings. I think FH4 has the best control scheme, but could still use some improvement (and features). To maximize the inputs available, the photo mode should be accessed through the start/pause menu, rather than having them mapped to buttons that could be useful for other functions. The standard LT brake, RT accelerate, LS steering and RS camera (with the click of it being a 180 degree look back) are a very simple base scheme. LB to use the clutch, X and B should be downshift and upshift respectable, RB for the handbrake, A for nitrous, Y for rewind, LS click for the horn, the "select" button would be for interact/map when there's nothing to interact with, left d-pad would function the same way GTA5's would regarding the radio (including holding it + RS to select a specific station), down d-pad would function as FH4 does, where you can choose telemetry or a gps assistant, up d-pad could enlarge and extend the mini-map to give an idea of what is ahead. right d pad could pull up a list of mini functions, such as blinkers, headlights, windows, convertible roof, neon lighting, engine off, hydraulics, air bags, cruise control, etc.
Map/Environment: The map can be a real place or a fictional place. Being able to visit a real place from the comfort of your home is nice, but visiting a fantasy land with no creative restrictions would be nice. Some really cool things that were imagined could happen because there is no need to resemble a real place. Day/night cycle with a weather cycle depending on which part of the map you are on, where snow can be on top of mountains. The map needs to be large, no smaller than FH4, ideally larger than the individual TDU2 maps with little to no exploration restrictions. I'd like to see a couple very long straightaways or near straightaways to allow cars to top out on speed. This could be combined with a highway loop system that can wrap around a large portion of the map. Beaches, bumpy terrain areas for intense offroading and of course tunnels for the sound of engines roaring through and echoing. A moderately large mountain would be cool for a hill climb and maybe somewhere to descend from the mountain with multiple consecutive hairpins from the mountain would be nice for drifting. I’d love for the map to have spots to evoke nostalgia for many of us that have played many racing games throughout the year, with an example being when I played TC1 for the first time and I was in LA, it brought back fond memories of MCLA. Even some areas do not have to be specific, but some areas on TC2 reminded me of the speed challenges on NFSPS. Having a/a few tuning shops across the map would be really cool, along with a few NPC cars completely RNG based on model and visual customization so that every time you visit the tuners, you see something new so the tuner feels less stale over time. Barn finds/TDU2 style wrecks. Having racing tracks incorporated into the map that are accessible while in free roam and used for races would be cool, like TC1/TC2, especially an oval track with an optional infield layout. Having a parking garage or two would be nice as you can do many things with them. I liked how there was one incorporated in MCLA and NMFSMW(2012) provided a good experience while in them. We should have a GTA5 style 48 minute irl day/night cycle with about 10 hours in game (20 minutes irl) of nighttime and 14 hours in game (28 minutes irl) of daytime to provide a balance most would find enjoyable. While viewing the full sized map in the menu, we should be able to zoom out a lot or zoom in to nearly street view, like TC2. Roads need to have believable lane width, unlike how the lanes have become wider and wider every FH installment. We should have some back roads that are very slim and have room to accommodate one car width covering both directions. Gas/petrol stations are nice to see as that is something that some games don't include enough. The planes flying in TC2 add to the immersiveness. Having an airport with a long airstrip is something that is seen as important. It was a place for people to frequently congregate in GTA4/FH2 and the lack of a nice, unobstructed airstrip in FH4 is seen as something that's a letdown. Real life traffic cars with several color options each to increase immersiveness, also cars represent surroundings (taxis in the city, utility vehicles in a rural area, etc). Having pedestrians on foot can also add into the immersive feeling, including them reacting to your presence by having dialogue and running away if you're being reckless. Some places will be in various stages of construction (similar to GTA) and over the course of updates they'll come further along and finish construction and some will become interactive spaces. Some places will also become the sights of demolition.
Camera settings: Getting the right view and feel for cameras is important to giving you the most comfortable experience to get the feel for where your car is at and focus on surroundings in the way that is desired. Importantly, having bumper, hood, cockpit (with and without steering wheel) and chase cameras is a great start. There should also be an "action" camera with additional sense of speed, sensitivity towards turns, etc. Although this isn't a racing game, Rocket League inspired me to take a deeper dive into the thoughts of camera perspectives. Adjusting RL camera settings can assist your ability to be aware of surroundings and I'm sure the same would apply to actual racing games. Settings for RL that would be nice to apply to racing games would be the ability to turn on or off camera shake upon collisions, the FOV, distance of the camera away from the car (and distance gain relative to speed, if desired), camera height in relativity to the vehicle (could be important with SUVs/trucks) and angle at which the camera points towards the ground/sky. I'd like to see settings to turn vignetting and motion blur from a 0-100% scale. This effect is often used to create a sense of speed, but is often found to be disruptive towards viewing surroundings and braking zones. As I feel this would pertain to the player's perception/camera adjustment, I think the cockpit views should contain an adjustable seat, such as TDU1. Keeping something like the drift camera for cockpit views, along with the settings they have related to it in FH4 would be nice.
User interface/HUD: I think being consistent to many other racing games would be good in many ways. Ideally, the ability to adjust which corner things are in would be the best, but if the customization wasn't an option, this is how I think it should be. Having the speedometetachometeodometer in the bottom right would be nice, along with the ability to display it in an analog or digital format, such as FH4. The map should be on the bottom left and should have two levels of details for options; one being a minimalist design with no border that gradually fades out (similar to Grid Autosport's track layout minimap, mixed with the off road icon detail of FH4). The second map option should be similar to a mixture of NFS Heat and TDU1 in terms of borders on the mini-map and detail to show side roads/terrains. The ability to adjust the map rotating or not would be nice. We should also be able to see our recent driving path in a thin line on the map, such as TDU2. The race position should be in the top right and all other race details (total time in race and sprint race % or lap count, best and previous lap) should be in the top left. Another thing that could add into the immersion would be changing the opacity of the HUD, from 0-100% so you could make it mostly transparent, but visible enough to be useful if that is what is desired. Having an odometer built into the HUD would be nice as well. Games such as TC2 have the speedometer and mini-map flipped from the standard positions and it is a minor grievance. The speedometers in non-cockpit views should be able to resemble the car's actual speedometer as seen in TDU and NFS Shift. We should be able to filter the map well when in that menu, similar to FH4.
Event Types: Blueprints (FH3), random events where you can taxi or tail someone (TDU2), Drag races with proper street light, track light or an NPC human signaling in the middle of the road making the countdown (also with burnouts like NFSPS), score based drift racing, sprint races, circuit races, speed trap races (NFSMW), pink slip and money wager races (MCLA), unordered races (MC3), rivals (FH3/4), true street races and official sanctioned races (FH3/4 and NFSH) and end the game with a goliath type of race (FH3/4). Off road racing in the form of sprints and circuits would be nice. Bringing over speed traps, speed zones, drift zones and danger signs/long jumps from FH4/NFSH would be nice. Removing the potential disruption of traffic would be nice by ghosting vehicles in these situations, as FH4 has done. A route creator along the lines of MCLA/FH4 would be nice with the ability to add/remove some objects like barriers and ramps. The TDU2 style limited time events would be cool. Maybe a certain event would be worth double money or level progression. Some of the limited time races would utilize the places being constructed and demolished.
Online Play: Free roam such as TC2/FH4 in terms of grouping with friends is ideal, but have the option to have private lobbies (up to as many players as the developers can make work) and the ability to search for public free roam lobbies based on preferences of drifting, car meets, cruising, etc. Free roamers should be able to disable or enable collisions with random players not in their group. Lacking the collisions removes some of the immersiveness and the ghosted appearance ruins things such as drifting tandems and trains with random players. Something similar to Forzathon from FH4 could help players unite and group together and optionally have something to do in the lobby every hour. Ranked and unranked playlist organization like FH4, but make completely separate on and off road playlists for online along with a voting system for the class of racing and location. Online race collision penalties and ghosting similar to FH4. Free roam quick 1v1 wager races against other players in cruises. We should have the option to play through the campaign in a cooperative fashion, similar to FH4/TC2. Cross play would be nice to implement.
Driving Features: Race Driver Grid style rewinds as they're probably the smoothest working rewinds compared to the segmented rewind system in other racing titles. TC2 back on track compared to FH4 weird reset, FRIM (TDU2)/skill chain (FH1-4) in freemode to reward in small XP/money. The ability to enable settings on a 0-100% slider would be nice as well as a detailed damage model. The ability to render in more tire smoke than other games would be nice. I'm aware it requires a lot of system resources, but I would like to see how far it could be pushed on next generation consoles/and always-improving top of the line PCs. Using the car with manual transmission would allow us to put the car in neutral. Some vehicles with visible engines/engine components have a noticeable shake while idle, so seeing that would be nice. Being able to enable/disable fuel management (both for cruising/racing) would be nice, along with gas/petrol stations to refill the fuel and nitrous (just a drive-thru required). Slipstreaming other cars will make your car faster, not give nitrous like NFS. Nitrous should slowly regenerate like NFSMW2005, where there is also a slight delay for it to begin regenerating again, unlike TC2 where it begins regenerating immediately. Difficulty settings to lower driving assistance, if desired. Wipers operating along with rain buildup would clearly add some realism. Reversing your car would add a backup camera in place of the infotainment system displaying the map until you've left the reverse gear. While driving in the cockpit, the wheel needs to be given a 900ish degree rotation from lock to lock to add into the realistic feeling of being in a car.
Non-Driving Features: Players should be able to enter their homes similar to GTA5 and TDU2 and they should be able to have a vast array of customization for their house and a trophy room, which can be earned from high tier sanctioned races/tournaments (inspired by NFL 2K5/Auto Modellista), photos taken in game can be framed and displayed around the house (TDU2) and multiple garages and garage types like TDU/GTA along with the ability to interact with and move cars around different garages and spaces within the garages. The ability to test drive any car at any level of progression and visit themed new dealerships and used dealerships would be cool (TDU/TC). Character customization would be nice to control the appearance of your character, such as a plastic surgeon and clothing stores. The ability to control blinkers, headlights, windows, convertible tops/sunroofs, neon lighting, turning the engine off, operating hydraulics and adjusting air bags. Having a large variety of standard and gimmick horns. Using horns to control police lights to flash rapidly upon the horn being pressed, along with the siren remaining operating upon letting go of the horn. The internal navigation/infotainment screens of cars show the in game map/gps (TDU2). We could see the drone from FH4 return as it’s a good way to view tricky areas and get a live view of other players without obstructing them. Wheelspins (FH4) exist, but guarantee car or money and have the potential of earning clothes as a side bonus. We could maybe have a casino (similar to TDU2/GTA5) with various attractions, such as slots, a daily wheelspin for a rotating car weekly, the ability to bet on real life PvP races that the large room would randomly put you into spectate and other casino based activities. Our character shouldn't be mute throughout the story, we should be given a few voice choices for a little more personality for our character (similar to how Saints Row operates its voices). Car clubs would be cool, similar to FH3, along with leaderboards based on the clubs. Oil changes at the performance shops and car washes would be nice. Garages/dealerships and tuning shops will have various ambient noises (hydraulic lifts, airsaws, torches, metal slamming, etc.) and subtle music.
Photo mode: This deserves its own category and also can help a company market the game by users sharing their photos if the mode allows such great photos people will be prone to sharing them. We should have a filtetime of day/weather system like TC2. The focusing and motion blur of FH4 is well executed. We should be able to zoom in and out (adjust focal length) without it altering our field of view. We should be able to apply different lens effects, such as fisheye, rectilinear, etc. The camera should have the ability to position freely, in terms of raise, lower, tilt, rotate, etc. The maximum height for the camera needs to be much higher than FH4. The camera should have the potential to be on a gimbal, so it can remain even while a car is going up and down a hill to emphasize how drastic the ascent or descent is. All these features on top of standard stuff such as exposure, saturation, etc. Also, the live rewind and fast forward again option in TC2 is amazing. It’s easy to miss that perfect single frame shot on other games, but the ability to do that solves it.
Soundtrack: It needs to be eclectic with hip-hop, rock and electronic (maybe 2 of each) like modern and classic hip-hop and rock and electronic can be split between chill and hype. Maybe we can get pop, country and classical stations? Have a mix of some lesser known songs and also some billboard topping hits. Don't have stations where many of their songs sound very similar. Something great that could be added could be Spotify integration if any company can figure it out/contract Spotify. Groove integration was a good idea on FH, but Groove wasn't successful. Having the ability to fully mute all music sounds would also be nice (unlike FH4).
Vehicles: As I said, I will not be going over brands, but I would like to see a variety of entry level cars, sports cars, super cars, hyper cars and full on race cars. Concept cars would be great, as they are seen in limited fashion on most open world titles. I'd like trucks and SUVs as well for off roading and to maintain a wide variety of vehicles on par with FH4. I’d also like to see a vehicle categorization similar to FH4 (i.e. Hypercars, classic muscle, etc.). While I'd like to see a variety of vehicle types, I'd still prefer to see quality over quantity. Each vehicle needs to be replicated well and many should have extensive customization. We should be able to favorite cars and also choose a random car (totally random or random from favorites for whatever vehicles are applicable to the given event or freeroam. We should be able to tag vehicles as designed for off-road, wet driving, drifting, drag, etc. These will just be two examples, but we should be able to provide donor cars to speciality shops and convert them into improved, rarer editions. Two conversions that I'll reference would be converting a Porsche Carrera GT into a Gemballa Mirage GT or a Mustang GT into a Saleen S302. A growing variety of vehicles over the course of time, similar to FH4 and TC2.
Visual Customization: No visual adjustments will relate to performance gains or losses (i.e. camber, wheel swaps/sizes, bodykits, etc.) other than you will need to equip some form of spoilewing to adjust rear downforce. We should be able to set wheels smaller than stock, as well as larger. Track width should be an option with multiple sliders (like NFS2015). We should be given manufacturer options for paint, wheels and interior choices, etc. (TDU2/TC2). We should be able to save paint colors (MCLA), instead of just having them in recents and eventually disappear (FH). We should be able to adjust trim as chrome, titanium, gold, black, etc. (MC3) The paint options of NFS Heat and MCLA would be nice, such as gloss, metallic flake with size options, carbon fiber varieties, chrome, matte, satin, fading from left to right as well as top to bottom and the ability to add multiple colors in a color shifting paint job (MC3), colored nitrous (MC3/NFSH), colored tire smoke (GTA5/NFSH) and backfire (NFSH), tire design (MCLA/NFSH), wide body kits (both from manufacturers and developer designed), bumpers, spoilers/wings, skirts, mirrors and fenders (non real life brands can autosculpt like NFSC). Neon colors designs and patterns (TC2/NFSH), hydraulics (MCLA) and airbags (MCLA/NFSH) Brake calipers should be able to be from brands (MCLA/NFSH) or painted (TC2). Interior parts such as steering wheels and seats (MCLA), along with materials, alcantara, suede, leather, plastic, carbon fiber, chrome, etc. (TC2). We should be able to chop the roofs of some vehicles (MC3). Cars have individual licence plates and can get multiple states/countries given they fit the spacing allocated on each vehicle for them (MCLA) Tinted headlight and taillight housings are great options along with light bulb temperatures. Although it isn’t the taste of many people, we should be able to do all kinds of unique styles, such as monster truck (or at least an extreme lift), donk, bosozoku and even NHRA style drag body modifications (with optional wheelie bar) for some of the vehicles you would see them on in real life, but modifications this drastic will impact performance and vehicle hit box/collision physics. Vinyls on widows should be a thing with the ability to make vinyls able to utilize different paint materials (NFSH). FH4 has the numerical system to mirror and scale things fairly well. I’d like to keep the placement system of FH4. Also, the FH4 marketplace to download tunes and designs is the best I've seen, so that can be duplicated. As this will blanket all of the above, some customization parts should be recommended by a popular magazine or website. MC3 did this with Dub and created a fantastic game with a lasting legacy and many of the style options were relevant when the game was released and for a while after. We should be able to adjust tire width and profile, similar to MCLA. The ability to paint engine bays and accent parts would be nice, similar to NFS UG2. Custom exhaust tips/mufflers would be something nice that many other games have incorporated.
Performance Customization and Tuning: PI system like Forza with classes (but actively tuned for balance), different turbos for rpm ranges/turbo lag, supercharger. We should have different tire compounds, even being able to set for front/rear separately. As mentioned earlier, a RWD car that is tuned well and driven well should have the potential to beat an AWD vehicle due to it being lighter. Keeping the tuning settings of what you can adjust would be ideal. We should have the ability to combine the live tuning of NFSH, but enhance it while at a test track (with an off road area in the middle) connected to the tuning shop. You can isolate many tuning options and slide them around while hot lapping. I’d like the ability to run fat rear drag tires, unlike FH4 where it’s just a tire compound.
Audio: This is something that will be very important to many, so great sounds like the noise of turbos on NFS2015 and raw engine noises of FH2 and other games held to a high standard will be important to nail. Exhaust tuning from NFSH was nice, but I would like to see a little more of a difference in the sound with this idea further improved. Getting the proper transmission noises can be useful for cars on top of just the engine noise. Tires skidding is nice noise to get correct for realism as well. Having nice ambient sounds will also be important for immersiveness, such as birds chirping, waves washing up on the beach, wind noises and great echo sounds for traveling through tunnels or densely surrounded areas, such as down a row of highrise buildings). Other than making a car sound how it sounds and making realistic sounds for the environment, there is not much more to be said. It's a moderately limited description, but still something that is pivotal.
Story/post launch content: I would like to see a sense of progression built up throughout the game by starting in a low end car as someone who freshly arrived in the are the map takes place in (MCLA), maybe the antagonist could be someone who scammed you in a previous city or dismissed your talent at the beginning of the game. For me, the outright story isn't too important, but can contribute to how much you will enjoy a racing game. Any DLC map expansion needs to be seamless and not require a separate load in, similar to Burnout Paradise Big Surf Island bridge or (MCLA South Central expansion) and unlike FH4 Fortune Island. The 1000 Club was a great thing that occurred on FH1 that would be nice to bring reason to use every car and for the 100%ers to have something else to chase. Police are something that hasn't been done extremely well in a racing only game in a very long time, in my opinion. I would ideally focus on everything else before attempting to add police in. If they were added in, something along the lines of NFSMW (2005) would be nice, but with higher stakes. We should have an end-game hero car, similar to the M3 GTR from NFSMW, but make it a car that isn't already iconic from another game, movie or real life racing, as people wouldn't think of the hero car associated to this hypothetical game, but related to whatever it was previously iconic in, as whatever work that went into making it that car would go to waste as people would want to overwrite that design. Alongside the hero car, we should also have a couple cars that are unique variations of pre-existing cars (Dub Edition cars of MCLA) for other special events (MCLA hard tournaments/FH3 street race bosses). The post-launch support needs to be good, unlike NFSH. Adding cars monthly would be a great start, along with any necessary QoL updates.
Sorry for any formatting or grammatical issues. I’d like to hear any additional features to add into racing games from the feedback of other people or changes that they would prefer. Also, if there are any ideas in here that others would like to emphasize. Any of this content is free for content creators to recycle if that is desired. I’d like to see some of these ideas be passed around and heard to developers on what could be improved upon. Many games have great ideas and I’d like to see them build off of each other’s greatness.
submitted by jxfl to The_Crew [link] [comments]

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure OC Tournament #5: Round 1 Match 26: Arpeggi VS Nalksi

The results are in for Match 24.
Both sides were starting to show signs of exhaustion. Max, no matter what he did, couldn’t push back the titaness in front of him who was looking much worse for wear physically, yet was still standing strong.
10
[Work It] whipped out one of its wrappings and Elliot made a launch for the lever. Max intercepted, using his own body weight and his stand as a deterrent, but to no avail against the unstoppable force that was Elliott.
Crash!
They both went flying to the front of the trolley, Elliott powering through the electric current passing through her, while Max himself was effectively pinned by Elliott’s arm and the front wall.
A struggle ensued, feeling like it lasted for an eternity. Slowly but surely, Elliott managed to get a wrapping around the lever, and was pulling it towards her.
The trolley kept speeding along.
Time felt as if it was going in slow motion, and the trolley was heading towards the museum when the lever flipped all the way. However, the back wheels had yet to pass the intersection.
The two fighters were launched towards the door as momentum suddenly shifted. The trolley derailed, flipping end over end. Forgetting about the fight, Elliot and Max, were holding each other and onto whatever they could find for dear life.
“CRACK”
“CRACK”
The trolley had crashed through a large glass panel, its own windows starting to shatter from the impact. Now sliding along the ground at a quickly decreasing speed, the trolley made its way through its final destination, the hall in which Los Fortuna’s largest fruit cart and glass panel convention was being held, with a loud CRACK! THUD! CRASH!
Commotion could be heard outside and a man could be heard yelling about his precious produce. The two released their grip from each other, Max having had his ribcage slightly crushed and Elliott having had her hair singed on top of the other injuries they had both suffered in their fight.
Max coughed and made a weak smile, still slightly out of breath, “I think… we can call this...a draw.”
Elliott just weakly nodded, less winded but still woozy, “Yeah, maybe we can go get dinner together. Call it my apology for this whole thing.”
“I’ll… Consider it,” Max answered, thankful at least that nobody seemed to be physically injured by the crash.
The match is a draw, with both parties earning a score of 71!
Category Winner Point Totals Comments
Popularity Baker Street Rat Pack 17-13
Quality Baker Street Rat Pack 23-20 Reasoning
JoJolity Sharp Lookers 21-28 Reasoning
Conduct Tie 10-10
Elliot and Max, despite everything, had a decent time of things, a sort of respect having mutually come of their shows of force in the brief runaway trolley trip, and when the time came for them to part ways, it was on decent terms, even if in the long run the methods of their teams were still so very radically different.
However, even as for once in the manmade islands that were Downtown Los Fortuna, nobody else was discovered to have died today, the pair were not the only ones to have had their eyes on the trolley.
Some saw in the crash opportunity, while others saw further reaffirmation of all that they stood for and deemed necessary.
The problem of the trolley has been resolved in this delicious way, but elsewhere, other vehicles speed out of control. In the furthest-off mountains of the Metropolitan Outskirts, two pairs fight in their cars, protected by the Angel they were pursuing.
Scenario:
An alleyway on the northern edge of Sound’s Garden, 7:34 PM
With a loud thud, Arpeggi Osso Buco slammed the head of a mugger into a wall, standing by some sort of small, barely-legal casino. The mugger had come up to him and demanded money at knifepoint, likely to fund his gambling addiction or something like that. The mugger had no idea what he was up against, swiftly getting disarmed and defeated, Arpeggi not even needing to bring out NEXT LEVEL.
“Arpeggi, calm down. This anger isn’t helping you fight better - it’s making you reckless. What would you have done if your opponent had a stand? You have to remain cautious and prepared for all eventualities.” NEXT LEVEL chided once the fight was over. “Yeah, yeah, I know, and I’m trying, but… Whatever. I’ll do better next time.” Arpeggi responded, NEXT LEVEL clearly not content with the response.
As usual, Arpeggi was tired, stressed, and more than mildly annoyed even before the mugger’s attack. Somehow, since he came to the city, the rate of people who tried to mug him in random alleyways around the city had seemed to drastically increase, and he was sick of it. Perhaps he needed to avoid alleyways altogether. Then again, he had come to Sound’s Garden to dish out some vigilante justice for such people, so maybe sticking to alleyways was the right call.
Though he had only been in Los Fortuna for a couple of months, it didn’t take long for Arpeggi to realize that focusing more on Sound’s Garden during his stints as a vigilante would be a good idea. He’d caught onto faint rumors of underground fighting rings and other such places, contract killers and bizarre games which his allies brushed perilously against and barely survived, but even when ignoring the district’s underground he found plenty of work to keep him busy.
With a sigh, he began making his way out the alleyway, before hearing a rustling from behind him. Someone was there. Quickly turning around, he spotted a figure moving through the alleyway at a distance, and then disappearing into a wall. It was cast in shadow, and yet he could tell that there was something… off, about it. It was almost humanoid, distorted and warped, and through the shadow, it had a red, almost fleshlike color. Moreover, he couldn’t help but notice the pungent smell it gave off.
“... Nex, suit me up.” Arpeggi quietly said, taking slow steps towards where he last spotted the figure. After transforming, and with NEXT LEVEL forming around him, Arpeggi made his way over, remaining alert and keeping a fighting stance, prepared for any sudden attack. Reaching the spot, he saw nothing. Whatever had been there before was gone. Suddenly, he heard something from right behind him -
Click. Click. Click.
The smell having grown even more overwhelming, Arpeggi quickly turned around, spinning and driving a fist into what was behind him, only for the strike to do… nothing. Despite the increased strength NEXT LEVEL gave Arpeggi, the figure, now looming over him, its malformed skin and so many eyes upon him now quite visible, quickly recovered. With a quick movement of its arm, it stabbed NEXT LEVEL’s rubber sleeves with something, and Arpeggi lost consciousness.
A street on the northern edge of Sound’s Garden, 7:36 PM
Following Alexis and Cybil’s successful foray into the world of theater a few weeks back, the Judecca Highrollers had heard of a secretive underground fighting ring that operated from within Sound’s Garden. From what Nalksi Stracciella had heard, it certainly was not to her taste, but she needed to know more about it, and to that end, she had sent one of the few members of Focolare that had come to spread their mission in Los Fortuna to seek it out and to gather information.
With Nalksi having already had business in the area as the CEO of Taicarn, she had decided to meet up with said member afterwards, organizing a meeting spot and taking time out of her schedule to take in the information that they had gathered. Fifteen minutes past the specified time for the meeting and with no contact from the information gatherer, it was clear that the meeting wasn’t going to happen. It made her apprehensive, certainly; people loyal to her were not the types to simply blow a meeting off, but every follower she had here was in a sensitive position, and she couldn’t simply send more the problem’s way. As it was, she had no leads.
And so, she walked through the street, cars and people alike passing her by. Her ride back to the Eighth Circle was a couple of minutes away, leaving her to walk alone through the bustling streets of Sound’s Garden, taking in the sights. Unfortunately, the sights weren’t much to take in - many drunk partygoers, many desperate people who lost their savings in casinos, and many overwhelming neon lights, which, in Nalksi’s opinion, were somewhat garish.
As Nalksi walked, however, she spotted someone, walking right past her. He stood at 6’6”, broad-shouldered, bald-headed with dirty blond facial hair which had been kept to a stylish stubble. His vest had odd shoulder pads, and his sunglasses hid his eyes well, yet he seemed unafraid.
While he was not a man he had met in person, she had heard much of this man and seen his reprehensible face - this was none other than the suburb of Aurelio’s very own serial killer, and an all-around frustratingly aesthetically skilled home designer, Mr. Jones. She’d heard much of the spectacle of the personal “game” he had set up and streamed on Bifrost, both from her teammate who had gotten caught up in it and from the ones that had watched it (Bucket in particular seemed particularly enthused about it, even paying extra to boost the server’s stream quality and be able to see Manta “getting the shit kicked out of them”, in his words, live as it happened).
Nalksi turned to get a better look of him, but as she hurried after him, she couldn’t find him within the crowd any more. Mr. Jones... She couldn’t help but think of what he might have been doing in the entertainment district. He was scum, toying with others for his own amusement and making a spectacle out of it. In tandem with the district’s seedier underbelly. Nalksi’s displeasure with the fact that Manta had let the killer go increased even further, seeing the man walk free like this, even look quite relaxed in the brief glances heard.
A distorted voice, yet still familiar, came from behind her.
“We had a feeling you’d be in the area, Stracciella. What a stroke of luck we bumped into each other, though… A good stroke for me, less so for you, I guess.”
Nalksi turned around, trying to spot Jones, but he was nowhere to be seen.
“Whoops, missed me! You just have the worst luck with meetings today, don’t ya?”
Nalksi turned and turned, but always he seemed just behind her, surer-footed with his Stand, likely, than she could be now. She didn’t want to do this in public, but the situation seemed desperate, and if anyone in this crowd gave a damn what Mr. Jones was doing, they sure didn’t say a thing. She would need to match him and overpower him, use her Stand, maybe. But even then, where the hell was he? The crowd was busy, but not busy enough to completely obscure him from her watchful gaze, and yet he had managed to disappear. He must’ve used his stand to-
Click. Click. Click.
As she turned behind herself to look again, from the ground in front of Nalksi rose the enormous, distorted arm of Conqueror Worm, giant eye-sporting hand and all, holding onto something. Nalksi quickly tried to double back, but not in time, as the Worm reached out and quickly stabbed her with the odd object he was holding. Before Nalksi passed out, the crowd passing over and ignoring her, she just barely managed to catch a glimpse of it - a small and inconspicuous pen.
The last thing she heard as something engulfed her was a reassurance. “Hey, don’t panic now… I won’t be the one to hurt ya, after all, so you might just stand a chance.”
An intersection by the edge of Sound’s Garden, 7:52 PM
With throbbing headaches, both Nalksi and Arpeggi woke up, finding themselves on a concrete sidewalk. Getting up, they saw each other, a few meters of distance between them. Around them were still the bustling streets of Sound’s Garden, right by a large and bustling intersection. Still somewhat weary, they noticed a familiar smell.
“You’re finally awake! Guess what, you two, ya passed out hard, and now it’s rush hour and you’re so very very far from home!”
That disturbed voice was enough, of course, to fully wake both of these people up, as well as the horrible smell - they were so damn close to the seemingly invincible Conqueror Worm. Dazed, confused, and aware they were under some sort of effect, though neither was the type who quite accepted being so brazenly screwed around with, they had a feeling it would be useless to do anything but let him peacock until it was time to explain what the hell was happening.
“Alright, we rolling? Send your pogs in the chat if the stream is comin’ out A-O-Kay!” Worm waited a few moments, then, and his wide maw turned into something resembling an amused grin. “Great, alright, good! Welcome to your inaugural stream, the start of a new era for Sound’s Garden… Rigged together by yours truly to be completely free of any Internet monitoring types, with my own proprietary systems in place keeping any of you deep web viewers at home or elsewhere from being spotted! And introducing to you our contestants here, Arpeggi Osso Buco and Nalksi Stracciella! The humble Agora Row pastry chef and the hash-tag-girl-boss of that coalition making waves by our waterside, you might be asking, ‘what do these two have in common? Well, you didn’t hear it from ol’ Wormy, but I hear both of them have some pretty involved double lives that have made them little blips on the big boss’ radar!”
“He’s just…” Arpeggi was confused now, as the man gallivanted around the nearby intersection, muttering quietly to himself and, coincidentally, to the nearby Nalksi. “He’s parading around in the streets… Do the people driving seriously not notice this? They aren’t even swerving around him!”
“That… I’m not sure it’s so simple,” Nalksi said, putting her thoughts together, under the impression they were having a conversation, “because I also ran into him in a crowd, earlier, and even when he started taunting me, throwing that Stand around, and even bystanders didn’t seem to think twice. But his Stand is the type normal people can interact with… Isn’t it?”
“Quite proudly in fact!” Worm called out loudly, pointing his extended arm, hand, finger, and an eyeball on his palm Nalksi’s way, the anonymous stream viewers hearing a bell dinging to imply a correct answer edited in. He started to saunter on over, shrugging and idly fiddling with a pen in his hand. Arpeggi tried to step away slightly, still yet to activate his Stand, while Nalksi stood her ground. “So that is quite the contradiction, right? What on earth could the answer to all this beTHINK FAST!”
He wound his arm, and suddenly he was cleaving at Arpeggi with an enormous, lengthy swinging axe, meant to fit on an enormous ceiling, the blade hitting him square in the neck, while the nearby Nalksi, much less agile, simply was grabbed by the head and callously tossed into the street in front of a semi truck.
Both sounds made a resounding thud, and the truck felt its balance thrown off for a moment, before skidding to a halt in the middle of the road. An auburn haired, middle-aged woman with a soothing voice, wearing overalls and a cap, stepped out of the vehicle, running over to where Nalksi previously was. “Wh-what the hell?! Did someone get thrown in front of me, or-?”
Nalksi, after getting flung by the car, got up, completely unharmed, if a little shocked and trying to collect herself. She muttered to herself, “I’m… I’m not hurt? What is…” She glanced at the older woman, then. “You, if you don’t leave here, you’re in grave danger. I’ll be fine, just forget what you’ve seen and drive off!”
The woman didn’t respond, stroking her chin and crouching, walking directly past her and looking where she was laying. “There’s… Nobody there. Not even a pothole, or something displaced. I coulda sworn I felt like I ran over a body or something…” She shrugged, slapping the side of the truck. “I’m takin’ you to a mechanic and sendin’ Omar Keshem the bill. That joyride through the forest really put you through hell.”
The truck drove away, and standing on the other side of the intersection, still reeling slightly but completely unharmed by the axe casually introduced and then stowed away, was Arpeggi, still himself trying to work out what happened here. “This… What have you done, Worm?! Why does the physical world mean nothing to us?!”
“Oh, wow, now it’s 1:1 on guessin’ what’s up first, so we have a match, ladies and gentlemen and everyone else!” He gestured at a seemingly random location with pointed clarity, specifically posing for it and then spinning around on his fell heel to address both of them. “That’s right, Arpeggi!” He produced the pen again. “Take a look at this ‘Pen!’ I know, it just looks like a cheap-lookin’ ballpoint you can buy in bulk in the middle’a July when they start the back-to-school sales these days, yeah? BUT! It ain’t an ordinary ‘pen,’ you know, though I’m sure ya realized that… It’s called ‘Generational Synthetic!’ Thanks to this thing right here I’ve gotten ya with, a favorite little piece I’ve borrowed, you’re basically Stand Objects now! And who wants to go over the basicmost rules of how Stands work, that everything either follows or deviates from?”
“First of all, you’re entirely invisible to anyone that isn’t a stand user! So you can run around like a ghost and spook’em or kill’em or somethin’ like that, and they won’t even know what hit them! In addition, anything that isn’t a stand or a stand object can’t hurt you! I’ve already showcased this on you both, what with the axes an’ the cars and whatnot, so no reason to elaborate further!”
“Now, that all sounds fine and dandy, doesn’t it? However, what about becoming normal? Now, obviously I wouldn’t do this to myself without knowin’ how to get outta this state, yeah? However, you lot have no idea how to free yourselves, and without assistance from ol’ Wormy here-” Jones said, taking a step forwards as a car drove right past him and barely missed him, “You’ll be stuck like this forever!”
“Now, I’m a busy Worm, and so are my associates, so that eternal scenario ain’t exactly something we’re interested in either, but if you wanna get out of this state, you gotta work for it first! And so… I’ll have you two put on a show!” Jones said, striking an exaggerated pose towards another random direction where a camera was likely hidden. “... but not one of those theater type shows, yeah? No… What’s more interestin’ is having you two fight it out, right here in this very intersection! That sound good to you? eh?”
“... And why do you expect us to trust you on this?” Arpeggi said, staring at Jones with contempt.
“Fine, fine, fine… You want proof? Well, not sure if this’ll be enough for you what with that attitude of yours, but it’ll certainly be enough for Miss Straciella over here!” Worm said as a giant, cracked TV screen covered in greenery emerged from his maw, showing on it a picture of three figures sprawled out on the floor somewhere unfamiliar. It wasn’t hard to recognize two of them - Nalksi and Arpeggi, but the third one was recognizable only to Nalksi as the member of Focolare she had sent out to find out more about the district’s underground. She tried to keep a stiff upper lip, but even then, the slight shift of her brow and increased focus on the screen gave the truth away.
“Yeah, betcha thought that the little spy you sent over wouldn’t be found by us, eh? Well, too bad! If you don’t want somethin’ else unfortunate happenin’ to this guy, then you better give us a damn good fight, capiche? And as for your bodies, well… I think it’s pretty clear that without’em, you’re not getting back to normal, yeah? And sure, sure, maybe right now you’re both thinkin’, ‘we just gotta get back to ‘em, and then we’re home free,’ right? Well, it’s a free country, so you’re free to try if ya want, track ‘em down wherever they are, and the people takin’ care of you three are free to stop you WAY easier than I could. Like this, though, only one of your bodies is gonna get messed up real bad, probably! Since you’re basically your own infinite-range Stands with substands now…”
Nalksi clicked her tongue, staring at Worm with contempt. So that was why the person she had sent didn’t show up… This, and the way he was using them as leverage against her, forcing her to abide by his disgusting games, infuriated her.
She would have to make Manta pay for letting Jones go once she got back to the Eighth Circle.
Arpeggi looked back at Jones with a similar disdain to Nalksi, ruminating to himself about what to do. “Arpeggi, despite how much it pains me to say this...” NEXT LEVEL quietly said, only to be interrupted by Arpeggi.
“Yeah, I know. We have to do what he says, both for ourselves and the one caught up in all this. Then, when we’re back to normal...” He curled his hand up into a fist. For now, he would just have to subside by imagining how beating the living daylights out of Jones would feel.
Though he wasn’t much of a fan of having to fight a woman he’d just sort of happened to see on the street, something about her, her reputation as a businessperson and the rumors surrounding that, and the way she carried herself, the words the Worm said directed to her in particular, made him realize that she was a vicious opponent who could certainly hold her own in combat against him… No, wait, that may have been too generous, by how she spoke next.
“So it has come to this… I don’t know you well, Arpeggi Osso Buco, and I don’t intend to tell you more about me than what this insect has already revealed, but I cannot die here, as some phantom hidden from the world in plain sight, and I will not tolerate what this man and his associates have done to one of my own. I must live on here, return to my body, and wreak something worse than any hell they could ever know upon every individual watching this place. I suggest that you, yourself, stand down and let me pass easily, and for such a favor, I will not forget you. For come the future-”
“Be quiet,” Arpeggi interrupted, voice snapping and leaving the distant Nalksi taken aback. “You said you weren’t going to say more about yourself to me, and then went on anyway… You think I want to hear it? Or that you’re better than them? People like you, sending someone into this hell in your stead and acting like you’re not to blame when it goes awry, talking big about the world you intend to shape… I’ve known so many like you, Stracciella, so I know damn well what you are. I don’t like that we’ve been forced into this circumstance, and I damn well intend to wipe the floor with these men myself, with people worth a damn to have by my side, but that doesn’t mean I intend to stand aside and let you thrive!”
The young man prepared his Stand, then, striking a pose as NEXT LEVEL surrounded his body. He was ready, willing, prepared to fight. “I’ll knock your self-important ass into the pavement!”
“You…” Finally, the previously speechless Nalksi was able to find her words, clenching her fist at what he was saying, seething and beginning to allow the underlying viciousness seep into her outer demeanor. “How dare you liken me and all I aspire to to them? If that’s what you see me as, then I will show you no sympathy either.”
“Eheheheh, looks like we’ve picked some good ones tonight, everybody! They’re gonna rip each other to shreds right here in traffic!” Worm, then, slipped away from the scene, sliding away and reemerging atop a nearby overhang, a microphone clipped to the maw of his Stand now. “I’ll be commentating the entire thing, and doin’ on-site everything-I-can to get you fine people the best of audio, visual, you name it! But hey, looks like they’re about to start, so let’s all say that loud and clear..!”
“OPEN THE GAME!!”
(Art by CaptainSpooky27)
Location: The middle of a busy four way intersection, cars passing by almost all the time. The road is represented by the grey tiles, the sidewalks by light grey tiles, and nearby buildings by dark grey squares. The dark grey rectangles are dividers. Each tile is 2x2 meters, making the arena 40x40 meters overall. There are four lanes on each “side”, each 4 meters long. The traffic lights will mostly be red at any one time, with the lights becoming green in a clockwise order, swapping every ten seconds - first, the lights at the northern side will be green, then they’ll become red after ten seconds and the ones on the eastern side will be green, and so on. Civilians will be using pretty much any opportunity available to cross the street, whenever the rules allow for it.
Goal: RETIRE your opponent!
Additional Information: Due to Generational Synthetic’s effect, the players have effectively been turned into stand objects - non stand users can’t see them, and will ignore them. Due to this, the players are also immune to damage caused by regular objects, and will simply get knocked back by it instead of being wounded. This applies to any byproducts of their stands as well, even if they could ordinarily be seen by civilians. It also means that, even if they ordinarily couldn’t, they are able to harm stands with their attacks.
The drivers of the passing cars and any of the civilians involved have 222 physicals, and they drive at speeds of up to 30 mph. They all want to get to their destinations soon, and as such will focus mostly on that, rarely getting out of their cars unless they’re forced to. If their cars are destroyed, they will get out of them and make their way on foot, exiting the arena before calling a cab or uber to pick them up.
Mr Jones has given you the okay on hurting civilians. You’re not sure you want it from him, but it’s there nonetheless.
Team Combatant JoJolity
BADD GUYS Arpeggi Osso Bucco "The blood's... slowly turning invisible... but in the center... she should be there." Make the most out of this odd “stand object” state that Generational Synthetic put you in, and utilize it creatively throughout the match!
Judecca Highrollers Nalksi Straciella “The invisible baby. Earlier, when your back was turned, I wrote on the baby.” Make the most out of this odd “stand object” state that Generational Synthetic put you in, and utilize it creatively throughout the match!
Link to the Official Player Spreadsheet
Link to Match Schedule
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submitted by Dungeon_Dice to StardustCrusaders [link] [comments]

Angélica Gorodischer - Three Stories [Translated by Lorraine Elena Roses and Marian Womack]

The Resurrection of the Flesh [Tr by Roses]

These first two tales published in Secret Weavers: Stories of the Fantastic by Women Writers of Argentina and Chile, edited by Marjorie Agosin (White Pine Press, 1992):
She was thirty-two, her name was Aurelia, and she had been married eleven years. One Saturday afternoon, she looked through the kitchen window at the garden and saw the four horsemen of the Apocalypse. Men of the world, those four horsemen of the Apocalypse. And good-looking. The first from the left was riding a sorrel horse with a dark mane. He was wearing white breeches, black boots, a crimson jacket, and a yellow fez with black pompoms. The second one had a sleeveless tunic overlaid with gold and violet and was barefoot. He was riding on the back of a plump dolphin. The third one had a respectable, black beard, trimmed at right angles. He had donned a gray Prince of Wales suit, white shirt, blue tie and carried a black leather portfolio. He was seated on a folding chair belted to the back of white-haired dromedary. The fourth one made Aurelia smile and realize that they were smiling at her. He was riding a black and gold Harley-Davidson 1200 and was wearing a white helmet and dark goggles and had long, straight, blond hair flying in the wind behind him. The four were riding in the garden without moving from the spot. They rode and smiled at her and she watched them through the kitchen window.
In that manner, she finished washing the two teacups, took off her apron, arranged her hair and went to the living room.
"I saw the four horsemen of the Apocalypse in the garden," she told her husband.
"I'll bet," he said without raising his eyes from his paper.
"What are you reading?" Aurelia asked.
"Hmmm?"
"I said they were given a crown and a sword and a balance and power."
"Oh, right," said her husband.
And after that a week went by as all weeks do--very slowly at first and very quickly toward the end--and on Sunday morning, while she made the coffee, she again saw the four horsemen of the Apocalypse in the garden, but when she went back to the bedroom she didn't say anything to her husband.
The third time she saw them, one Wednesday, alone, in the afternoon, she stood looking at them for a half hour and finally, since she had always wanted to fly in a yellow and red dirigible; and since she had dreamed about being an opera singer, an emperor's lover, a co-pilot to Icarus; since she would have liked to scale black cliffs, laugh at cannibals, traverse the jungles on elephants with purple trappings, seize with her hands the diamonds that lay hidden in mines, preside in the nude over a parade of nocturnal monsters, live under water, domesticate spiders, torture the powerful of the earth, rob trains in the tunnels of the Alps, set palaces on fire, lie in the dark with beggars, climb on the bridges of all the ships in the world; finally--since it was sadly sterile to be a rational and healthy adult--finally, that Wednesday afternoon alone, she put on the long dress she had worn at the last New Year's party given by the company where her husband was assistant sales manager and went out to the garden. The four horsemen of the Apocalypse called her, the blond one on the Harley-Davidson gave her his hand and helped her up onto the seat behind him, and there they went, all five, raging into the storm and singing.
Two days later her husband gave in to family pressure and reported the disappearance of his wife.
"Moral: madness is a flower aflame," said the narrator. Or in other words, it's impossible to inflame the dead, cold, viscous, useless, and sinful ashes of common sense.

The Perfect Married Woman

If you meet her on the street, cross quickly to the other side and quicken your pace. She’s a dangerous lady. She’s about forty or forty-five, has one married daughter and a son working in San Nicolas; her husband’s a sheet-metal worker. She rises very early, sweeps the sidewalk, sees her husband off, cleans, does the wash, shops, cooks. After lunch she watches television, sews or knits, irons twice a week, and at night goes to bed late. On Saturdays she does a general cleaning and washes windows and waxes the floors. On Sunday mornings she washes the clothes her son brings home—his name is Nestor Eduardo—she kneads dough for noodles or ravioli, and in the afternoon either her sister-inlaw comes to visit or she goes to her daughter’s house. It’s been a long time since she’s been to the movies, but she reads TV Guide and the police report in the newspaper. Her eyes are dark and her hands are rough and her hair is starting to go gray. She catches cold frequently and keeps a photo album in a dresser drawer along with a black crepe dress with lace collar and cuffs.
Her mother never hit her. But when she was six, she got a spanking for coloring on a door, and she had to wash it off with a wet rag. While she was doing it, she thought about doors, all doors, and decided that they were very dumb because they always led to the same places. And the one she was cleaning was definitely the dumbest of all, the one that led to her parents’ bedroom. She opened the door and then it didn’t go to her parents’ bedroom but to the Gobi desert. She wasn’t surprised that she knew it was the Gobi desert even though they hadn’t even taught her in school where Mongolia was and neither she nor her mother nor her grandmother had ever heard of Nan Shan or Khangai Nuru.
She stepped through the door, bent over to scratch the yellowish grit and saw that there was no one, nothing, and the hot wind tousled her hair, so she went back through the open door, closed it and kept on cleaning. And when she finished, her mother grumbled a little more and told her to wash the rag and take the broom to sweep up that sand and clean her shoes. That day she modified her hasty judgment about doors, though not completely, at least not until she understood what was going on.
What had been going on all her life and up until today was that from time to time doors behaved satisfactorily, though in general they were still acting dumb and leading to dining rooms, kitchens, laundry rooms, bedrooms and offices even in the best of circumstances. But two months after the desert, for example, the door that every day led to the bath opened onto the workshop of a bearded man dressed in a long uniform, pointed shoes, and a cap that tilted on one side of his head. The old man’s back was turned as he took something out of a highboy with many small drawers behind a very strange, large wooden machine with a giant steering wheel and screw, in the midst of cold air and an acrid smell. When he turned around and saw her he began to shout at her in a language she didn’t understand.
She stuck out her tongue, dashed out the door, closed it, opened it again, went into the bathroom and washed her hands for lunch.
Again, after lunch, many years later, she opened the door of her room and walked into a battlefield. She dipped her hands in the blood of the wounded and dead and pulled from the neck of a cadaver a crucifix that she wore for a long time under high-necked blouses or dresses without plunging necklines. She now keeps it in a tin box underneath the nightgowns with a brooch, a pair of earrings and a broken wristwatch that used to belong to her mother-in-law. In the same way, involuntarily and by chance, she visited three monasteries, seven libraries, and the highest mountains in the world, and who knows how many theaters, cathedrals, jungles, refrigeration plants, dens of vice, universities, brothels, forests, stores, submarines, hotels, trenches, islands, factories, palaces, hovels, towers and hell.
She’s lost count and doesn’t care; any door could lead anywhere and that has the same value as the thickness of the ravioli dough, her mother’s death, and the life crises that she sees on TV and reads about in TV Guide.
Not long ago she took her daughter to the doctor, and seeing the closed door of a bathroom in the clinic, she smiled. She wasn’t sure because she can never be sure, but she got up and went to the bathroom. However, it was a bathroom; at least there was a nude man in a bathtub full of water. It was all very large, with a high ceiling, marble floor and decorations hanging from the closed windows. The man seemed to be asleep in his white bathtub, short but deep, and she saw a razor on a wrought iron table with feet decorated with iron flowers and leaves and ending in lion’s paws, a razor, a mirror, a curling iron, towels, a box of talcum powder and an earthen bowl with water. She approached on tiptoe, retrieved the razor, tiptoed over to the sleeping man in the tub and beheaded him. She threw the razor on the floor and rinsed her hands in the lukewarm bathtub water. She turned around when she reached the clinic corridor and spied a girl going into the bathroom through the other door. Her daughter looked at her.
“That was quick.”
“The toilet was broken,” she answered.
A few days afterward, she beheaded another man in a blue tent at night. That man and a woman were sleeping mostly uncovered by the blankets of a low, king-size bed, and the wind beat around the tent and slanted the flames of the oil lamps. Beyond it there would be another camp, soldiers, animals, sweat, manure, orders and weapons. But inside there was a sword by the leather and metal uniforms, and with it she cut off the head of the bearded man. The woman stirred and opened her eyes as she went out the door on her way back to the patio that she had been mopping.
On Monday and Thursday afternoons, when she irons shirt collars, she thinks of the slit necks and the blood, and she waits. If it’s summer she goes out to sweep a little after putting away the clothing and until her husband arrives. If it’s windy she sits in the kitchen and knits. But she doesn’t always find sleeping men or staring cadavers. One rainy morning, when she was twenty, she was at a prison, and she made fun of the chained prisoners; one night when the kids were kids and were all living at home, she saw in a square a disheveled woman looking at a gun but not daring to take it out of her open purse. She walked up to her, put the gun in the woman’s hand and stayed there until a car parked at the corner, until the woman saw a man in gray get out and look for his keys in his pocket, until the woman aimed and fired. And another night while she was doing her sixth grade geography homework, she went to look for crayons in her room and stood next to a man who was crying on a balcony. The balcony was so high, so far above the street, that she had an urge to push him to hear the thud down below, but she remembered the orographic map of South America and was about to leave. Anyhow, since the man hadn’t seen her, she did push him and saw him disappear and ran to color in the map so she didn’t hear the thud, only the scream. And in an empty theater, she made a fire underneath the velvet curtain; in a riot she opened the cover to a basement hatchway; in a house, sitting on top of a desk, she shredded a two-thousand-page manuscript; in a clearing of a forest she buried the weapons of the sleeping men; in a river she opened the floodgates of a dike.
Her daughter’s name is Laura Inés, her son has a fiancée in San Nicolás and he’s promised to bring her over on Sunday so she and her husband can meet her. She has to remind herself to ask her sister-in-law for the recipe for orange cake, and Friday on TV is the first episode of a new soap opera. Again, she runs the iron over the front of the shirt and remembers the other side of the doors that are always carefully closed in her house, that other side where the things that happen are much less abominable than the ones we experience on this side, as you can easily understand.

The Unmistakable Smell of Wood Violets [Tr by Womack]

Translated for the first time in Ann and Jeff Vandermeer's Big Book of Science Fiction (Vintage, 2016):
The news spread fast. It would be correct to say that the news moved like a flaming trail of gunpowder, if it weren't for the fact that at this point in our civilization gunpowder was archaeology, ashes in time, the stuff of legend, nothingness. However, it was because of the magic of our new civilization that the news was known all over the world, practically instantaneously.
"Oooh!" the tsarina said.
You have to take into account that Her Gracious and Most Illustrious Virgin Majesty Ekaterina V, Empress of Holy Russia, had been carefully educated in the proper decorum befitting the throne, which meant that she would never have even raised an eyebrow or curved the corner of her lip, far less would she have made an interjection of that rude and vulgar kind. But not only did she say "Oooh!," she also got up and walked through the room until she reached the glass doors of the great balcony. She stopped there. Down below, covered by snow, Saint Leninburg was indifferent and unchanged, the city's eyes squinting under the weight of winter. At the palace, ministers and advisers were excited, on edge.
"And where is this place?" the tsarina asked.
And that is what happened in Russia, which is such a distant and atypical country. In the central states of the continent, there was real commotion. In Bolivia, in Paraguay, in Madagascar, in all the great powers, and in the countries that aspired to be great powers, such as High Peru, Iceland, or Morocco, hasty conversations took place at the highest possible level with knitted brows and hired experts. The strongest currencies became unstable: the guarani rose, the Bolivian peso went down half a point, the crown was discreetly removed from the exchange rates for two long hours, long queues formed in front of the exchanges in front of all the great capitals of the world. President Morillo spoke from the Oruro Palace and used the opportunity to make a concealed warning (some would call it a threat) to the two Peruvian republics and the Minas Gerais secessionist area. Morillo had handed over the presidency of Minas to his nephew, Pepe Morillo, who had proved to be a wet blanket whom everybody could manipulate, and now Morillo bitterly regretted his decision. Morocco and Iceland did little more than give their diplomats a gentle nudge in the ribs, anything to shake them into action, as they imagined them all to be sipping grenadine and mango juice in the deep south while servants in shiny black uniforms stood over them with fans.
The picturesque note came from the Independent States of North America. It could not have been otherwise. Nobody knew that all the states were now once again under the control of a single president, but that's how it was: some guy called Jack Jackson-Franklin, who had been a bit-part actor in videos, and who, aged eighty-seven, had discovered his extremely patriotic vocation of statesman. Aided by his singular and inexplicable charisma, and by his suspect family tree, according to which he was the descendent of two presidents who had ruled over the states during their glory days, he had managed to unify, at least for now, the seventy-nine northern states. Anyway, Mr. Jackson-Franklin said to the world that the Independent States would not permit such a thing to take place. No more, just that they would not permit such a thing to take place. The world laughed uproariously at this.
Over there, in the Saint Leninburg palace, ministers cleared their throats, advisers swallowed saliva, trying to find out if, by bobbing their Adam's apples up and down enough, they might be able to loosen their stiff official shirts.
"Ahem. Ahem. It's in the south. A long way to the south. In the west, Your Majesty."
"It is. Humph. Ahem. It is, Your Majesty, a tiny country in a tiny territory."
"It says that it is in Argentina," the tsarina said, still staring through the window but without paying any attention to the night as it fell over the snow-covered roofs and the frozen shores of the Baltic.
"Ah, yes, that's right, that's right, Your Majesty, a pocket republic."
Sergei Vasilievich Kustkarov, some kind of councilor and, what is more, an educated and sensible man, broke into the conversation.
"Several, Your Majesty, it is several."
And at last the tsarina turned around. Who cared a fig for the Baltic night, the snow-covered rooftops, the roofs themselves, and the city of which they were a part? Heavy silk crackled, starched petticoats, lace.
"Several of what, Councilor Kustkarov, several of what? Don't come to me with your ambiguities."
"I must say, Your Majesty, I had not the slightest intention--"
"Several of what?"
The tsarina looked directly at him, her lips held tightly together, her hands moving unceasingly, and Kustkarov panicked, as well he might.
"Rep-rep-republics, Your Majesty," he blurted out. "Several of them. Apparently, a long time ago, a very long time, it used to be a single territory, and now it is several, several republics, but their inhabitants, the people who live in all of them, all of the republics, are called, they call themselves, the people, that is, Argentinians."
The tsarina turned her gaze away. Kustkarov felt so relieved that he was encouraged to carry on speaking:
"There are seven of them, Your Majesty: Rosario, Entre dos Rios, Ladocta, Ona, Riachuelo, Yujujuy, and Labodegga."
The tsarina sat down.
"We must do something," she said.
Silence. Outside it was not snowing, but inside it appeared to be. The tsarina looked at the transport minister.
"This enters into your portfolio," she said.
Kustkarov sat down, magnificently. How lucky he was to be a councilor, a councilor with no specific duties. The transport minister, on the other hand, turned pale.
"I think, Your Majesty...," he dared to say.
"Don't think! Do something!"
"Yes, Your Majesty," the minister said, and, bowing, started to make his way to the door.
"Where do you think you're going?" the tsarina said, without moving her mouth or twitching an eyelid.
"I'm just, I'm going, I'm just going to see what can be done, Your Majesty."
There's nothing that can be done, Sergei Vasilievich thought in delight, nothing. He realized that he was not upset, but instead he felt happy. And on top of everything else a woman, he thought. Kustkarov was married to Irina Waldoska-Urtiansk, a real beauty, perhaps the most beautiful woman in all of Holy Russia. Perhaps he was being cuckolded; it would have been all too easy for him to find that out, but he did not want to. His thoughts turned in a circle: and on top of everything else a woman. He looked at the tsarina and was struck, not for the first time, by her beauty. She was not so beautiful as Irina, but she was magnificent.
In Rosario it was not snowing, not because it was summer, although it was, but because it never snowed in Rosario. And there weren't any palm trees: the Moroccans would have been extremely disappointed had they known, but their diplomats said nothing about the Rosario flora in their reports, partly because the flora of Rosario was now practically nonexistent, and partly because diplomats are supposed to be above that kind of thing.
Everyone who was not a diplomat, that is to say, everyone, the population of the entire republic that in the last ten years had multiplied vertiginously and had now reached almost two hundred thousand souls, was euphoric, happy, triumphant. They surrounded her house, watched over her as she slept, left expensive imported fruits outside her door, followed her down the street. Some potentate allowed her the use of a Ford 99, which was one of the five cars in the whole country, and a madman who lived in the Espinillos cemetery hauled water all the way up from the Pará lagoon and grew a flower for her which he then gave her.
"How nice," she said, then went on, dreamily, "Will there be flowers where I'm going?"
They assured her that there would be.
She trained every day. As they did not know exactly what it was she had to do to train herself, she got up at dawn, ran around the Independence crater, skipped, did some gymnastic exercises, ate little, learned how to hold her breath, and spent hours and hours sitting or curled into strange positions. She also danced the waltz. She was almost positive that the waltz was not likely to come in handy, but she enjoyed it very much.
Meanwhile, farther away, the trail of gunpowder had become a barrel of dynamite, although dynamite was also a legendary substance and didn't exist. The infoscreens in every country, whether poor or rich, central or peripheral, developed or not, blazed forth with extremely large headlines suggesting dates, inventing biographical details, trying to hide, without much success, their envy and confusion. No one was fooled:
"We have been wretchedly beaten," the citizens of Bolivia said.
"Who would have thought it," pondered the man on the Reykjavík omnibus.
The former transport minister of Holy Russia was off breaking stones in Siberia. Councilor Sergei Vasilievich Kustkarov was sleeping with the tsarina, but that was only a piece of low, yet spicy, gossip that has nothing to do with this story.
"We will not allow this to happen!" Mr. Jackson-Franklin blustered, tugging nervously at his hairpiece. "It is our own glorious history that has set aside for us this brilliant destiny! It is we, we and not this despicable banana republic, who are marked for this glory!"
Mr. Jackson-Franklin also did not know that there were no palm trees or bananas in Rosario, but this was due not to a lack of reports from his diplomats but rather a lack of diplomats. Diplomats are a luxury that a poor country cannot afford, and so poor countries often go to great pains to take offense and recall all the knights commanders and lawyers and doctors and even eventually the generals working overseas, in order to save money on rent and electricity and gas and salaries, not to mention the cost of the banquets and all the money in brown paper envelopes.
But the headlines kept on appearing on the infoscreens: "Argentinian Astronaut Claims She Will Reach Edge of Universe," "Sources Claim Ship Is Spaceworthy in Spite of or Because of Centuries-Long Interment," "Science or Catastrophe?," "Astronaut Not a Woman but a Transsexual" (this in the Imperialskaya Gazeta, the most puritan of the infoscreens, even more so than the Papal Piccolo Osservatore Lombardo), "Ship Launches," "First Intergalactic Journey in Centuries," "We Will Not Allow This to Happen!" (Portland Times).
She was dancing the waltz. She woke up with her heart thumping, tried out various practical hairstyles, ran, skipped, drank only filtered water, ate only olives, avoided spies and journalists, went to see the ship every day, just to touch it. The mechanics all adored her.
"It'll work, they'll see, it'll work," the chief engineer said defiantly.
Nobody contradicted him. No one dared say that it wouldn't.
It would make it, of course it would make it. Not without going through many incredible adventures on its lengthy journey. Lengthy? No one knew who Langevin was anymore, so no one was shocked to discover that his theory contradicted itself, ended up biting its own tail, and that however long the journey took, the observers would only perceive it as having lasted minutes. Someone called Cervantes, a very famous personage back in the early years of human civilization--it was still debated whether he had been a physicist, a poet, or a musician--had suggested a similar theory in one of his lost works.
One autumn dawn the ship took off from the Independence crater, the most deserted part of the whole desert republic of Rosario, at five forty-five in the morning. The exact time is recorded because the inhabitants of the country had all pitched in together to buy a clock, which they thought the occasion deserved (there was one other clock, in the Enclosed Convent of the Servants of Santa Rita de Casino, but because the convent was home to an enclosed order nothing ever went in or out of it, no news, no requests, no answers, no nothing). Unfortunately, they had not had enough money. But then someone had had the brilliant idea which had brought in the money they needed, and Rosario had hired out its army for parades in friendly countries: there weren't that many of them and the ones there were weren't very rich, but they managed to get the cash together. Anyone who was inspired by patriotism and by the proximity of glory had to see those dashing officers, those disciplined soldiers dressed in gold and crimson, protected by shining breastplates, capped off with plumed helmets, their catapults and pouches of stones at their waists, goose-stepping through the capital of Entre Dos Rios or the Padrone Giol vineyards in Labodegga, at the foot of the majestic Andes.
The ship blasted off. It got lost against the sky. Before the inhabitants of Rosario, their hearts in their throats and their eyes clouded by emotion, had time to catch their breath, a little dot appeared up there, getting bigger and bigger, and it was the ship coming back down. It landed at 06:11 on the same morning of that same autumn day. The clock that recorded this is preserved in the Rosario Historical Museum. It no longer works, but anyone can go and see it in its display cabinet in Room A of the Museum. In Room B, in another display case, is the so-called Carballensis Indentic Axe, the fatal tool that cut down all the vegetation of Rosario and turned the whole country into a featureless plain. Good and evil, side by side, shoulder to shoulder.
Twenty-six minutes on Earth, many years on board the ship. Obviously, she did not have a watch or a calendar with her: the republic of Rosario would not have been able to afford either of them. But it was many years, she knew that much.
Leaving the galaxy was a piece of cake. You can do it in a couple of jumps, everyone knows that, following the instructions that Albert Einsteinstein, the multifaceted violin virtuoso, director of sci-fi movies, and student of space-time, gave us a few hundred years back. But the ship did not set sail to the very center of the universe, as its predecessors had done in the great era of colonization and discovery; no, the ship went right to the edge of the universe.
Everyone also knows that there is nothing in the universe, not even the universe itself, which does not grow weaker as you reach its edge. From pancakes to arteries, via love, rubbers, photographs, revenge, bridal gowns, and power. Everything tends to imperceptible changes at the beginning, rapid change afterward; everything at the edge is softer and more blurred, as the threads start to fray from the center to the outskirts.
In the time it took her to take a couple of breaths, a breath and a half, over the course of many years, she passed through habitable and uninhabitable places, worlds which had once been classified as existent, worlds which did not appear and had never appeared and probably would never appear in any cartographical survey. Planets of exiles, singing sands, minutes and seconds in tatters, whirlpools of nothingness, space junk, and that's without even mentioning those beings and things, all of which stood completely outside any possibility of description, so much so that we tend not to perceive them when we look at them; all of this, and shock, and fear more than anything else, and loneliness. The hair grew gray at her temples, her flesh lost its firmness, wrinkles appeared around her eyes and her mouth, her knees and ankles started to act up, she slept less than before and had to half close her eyes and lean backward in order to make out the numbers on the consoles. And she was so tired that it was almost unbearable. She did not waltz any longer: she put an old tape into an old machine and listened and moved her gray head in time with the orchestra.
She reached the edge of the universe. Here was where everything came to an end, so completely that even her tiredness disappeared and she felt once again as full of enthusiasm as she had when she was younger. There were hints, of course: salt storms, apparitions, little brushstrokes of white against the black of space, large gaps made of sound, echoes of long-dead voices that had died giving sinister orders, ash, drums; but when she reached the edge itself, these indications gave way to space signage: "End," "You Are Reaching the Universe Limits," "The Cosmos General Insurance Company, YOUR Company, Says: GO NO FURTHER," "End of Protected Cosmonaut Space," etc., as well as the scarlet polygon that the OMUU had adopted to use as a sign for that's it, abandon all hope, the end.
All right, so she was here. The next thing to do was go back. But the idea of going back never occurred to her. Women are capricious creatures, just like little boys: as soon as they get what they want, then they want something else. She carried on.
There was a violent judder as she crossed the limit. Then there was silence, peace, calm. All very alarming, to tell the truth. The needles did not move, the lights did not flash, the ventilation system did not hiss, her alveoli did not vibrate, her chair did not swivel, the screens were blank. She got up, went to the portholes, looked out, saw nothing. It was logical enough:
"Of course," she said to herself, "when the universe comes to an end, then there's nothing."
She looked out through the portholes a little more, just in case. She still could see nothing, but she had an idea.
"But I'm here," she said. "Me and the ship."
She put on a space suit and walked out into the nothing.
When the ship landed in the Independence crater in the republic of Rosario, twenty-six minutes after it had taken off, when the hatch opened and she appeared on the ramp, the spirit of Paul Langevin flew over the crater, laughing fit to burst. The only people who heard him were the madman who had grown the flower for her in the Espinillos cemetery and a woman who was to die that day. No one else had ears or fingers or tongue or feet, far less did they have eyes to see him.
It was the same woman who had left, the very same, and this calmed the crowds down at the same time as it disappointed them, all the inhabitants of the country, the diplomats, the spies, and the journalists. It was only when she came down the gangplank and they came closer to her that they saw the network of fine wrinkles around her eyes. All other signs of her old age had vanished, and had she wished, she could have waltzed tirelessly, for days and nights on end, from dusk till dawn till dusk.
The journalists all leaned forward; the diplomats made signals, which they thought were subtle and unseen, to the bearers of their sedan chairs to be ready to take them back to their residences as soon as they had heard what she had to say; the spies took photographs with the little cameras hidden away in their shirt buttons or their wisdom teeth; all the old people put their hands together; the men raised their fists to their heart; the little boys pranced; the young girls smiled.
And then she told them what she had seen:
"I took off my suit and my helmet," she said, "and walked along the invisible avenues that smelled of violets."
She did not know that the whole world was waiting to hear what she said; that Ekaterina V had made Sergei Vasilievich get up at five o'clock in the morning so that he could accompany her to the grand salon and wait there for the news; that one of the seventy-nine Northern States had declared its independence because the president had not stopped anything from happening or obtained any glory, and this had lit the spark of rebellion in the other seventy-eight states, and this had made Mr. Jackson-Franklin leave the White House without his wig, in pajamas, freezing and furious; that Bolivia, Paraguay, and Iceland had allowed the two Peruvian republics to join their new alliance and defense treaty set up against a possible attack from space; that the high command of the Paraguayan aeronautical engineers had promised to build a ship that could travel beyond the limits of the universe, always assuming that they could be granted legal immunity and a higher budget, a declaration that made the guarani fall back the two points that it had recently risen and then another one as well; that Don Schicchino Giol, the new padrone of the Republic of Labodegga at the foot of the majestic Andes had been woken from his most recent drinking bout to be told that he had now to sign a declaration of war against the Republic of Rosario, now that they knew the strength of the enemy's forces.
"Eh? What? Hunh?" Don Schicchino said.
"I saw the nothingness of everything," she said, "and it was all infused with the unmistakable smell of wood violets. The nothingness of the world is like the inside of a stomach throbbing above your head. The nothingness of people is like the back of a painting, black, with glasses and wires that release dreams of order and imperfect destinies. The nothingness of creatures with leathery wings is a crack in the air and the rustle of tiny feet. The nothingness of history is the massacre of the innocents. The nothingness of words, which is a throat and a hand that break whatever they touch on perforated paper; the nothingness of music, which is music. The nothingness of precincts, of crystal glasses, of seams, of hair, of liquids, of lights, of keys, of food."
When she had finished her list, the potentate who owned the Ford 99 said that he would give it to her, and that in the afternoon he would send one of his servants with a liter of naphtha so that she could take the car out for a spin.
"Thank you," she said. "You are very generous."
The madman went away, looking up to the skies; who knows what he was searching for. The woman who was going to die that day asked herself what she should eat on Sunday, when her sons and their wives came to lunch. The president of the Republic of Rosario gave a speech.
And everything in the world carried on the same, apart from the fact that Ekaterina V named Kustkarov her interior minister, which terrified the poor man but which was welcomed with open arms by Irina as an opportunity for her to refresh her wardrobe and her stock of lovers. And Jack Jackson-Franklin sold his memoirs to one of Paraguay's more sophisticated magazines for a stellar amount of money, which allowed him to retire to live in Imerina. And six spaceships from six major world powers set off to the edges of the universe and were never seen again.
She married a good man who had a house with a balcony, a white bicycle, and a radio which, on clear days, could pick up the radio plays that LLL1 Radio Magnum transmitted from Entre Dos Rios, and she waltzed in white satin shoes. The day that her first son was born a very pale green shoot grew out of the ground on the banks of the great lagoon.
submitted by MilkbottleF to shortstoryaday [link] [comments]

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